Death to the Dealer: 10 of the Most Annoying Cards in "Hearthstone"

Image via Complex Original

We start with a Rogue exclusive card, the entire purpose of which, is seemingly to annoy.

Headcrack lets your opponent do two direct damage to your hero at will. On its own that's not bad, but as long as they always play another card before Headcrack, they get to play it again as many times as they want. That return ability turns this card into the gaming equivalent of a toddler that won't stop poking you. Not only is it supremely annoying, but your options to resolve the annoyance are painfully limited. On its own, Headcrack isn't that valuable.However, that "flip the keyboard and concede" instinct it inspires makes it the bane of many existences.

It likely won't be long into your Hearthstone journey before you encounter the dreaded Murloc Rush Deck. It's a low-cost collection of cards that, when played just right, put you in a no-win scenario by the fifth round. Experts may be able to stave it off, but to new players, it is a source of well deserved dread.

The Murloc Warleader is the crux of that infuriating deck. It enhances the attack and survival abilities of the other Murloc Rush cards in play, just enough to eliminate most of the strategic options you have available to you at that point. That's what makes this card truly frustrating. It's just weak enough to make you think you still have a chance, but in reality is just prolonging the realization of your imminent demise.

Hearthstone pros know that there are certain cards you just don't leave alive longer than a single round, no matter what the cost. They likely learned this lesson from the Knife Juggler. The Knife Juggler might not look like much, but it's annoyance comes once you understand the fine print. Everytime your opponent plays a minion card, the Juggler does one damage to one of your minions, or your hero.

Essentially he's Hearthstone's verstion of a stationary turret. One that can cripple or destroy your entire game plan with little effort, or cost, required. Even though you usually have to give up something valuable to destroy the Knife Juggler, you have to do it, unless you want to bear witness to the full wrath of this early in-game annoyance.

It might be awhile before you learn Ragnaros' true name.

Instead, you'll likely know him by your panicked cry that accompanies his every appearance. "Oh shit, oh shit!"

If the Knife Juggler is Hearthstone's turret, than Ragnaros is its rocket launcher. Every time its summoner ends their turn, Ragnaros hurls an 8 damage fireball that can either one hit kill most cards in the game, or end your hero in mere minutes. If played right, no further action is required after using this card to end the game. But you know what the worst part is? With 8 attack and 8 health, removing Ragnaros requires you to make a lot of sacrifices, unless you happen to have one of a few rare cards. With the ability to turn surefire victory into instant defeat, Ragnaros is the crusher of dreams.

You know that threat some parents make to "turn this car around and go home if everyone doesn't start being quiet?" Equality is the Hearthstone version of that. While Equality will turn the health of all the minions your opponent has in-play to a measly one, as the text of the card suggests, it does the same to your minions as well. With few exceptions, this turns Equality into a true board clearer. A fresh start on the current game for a shocking low cost. There are other board clearing cards in Hearthstone, but none of them allow for it to be done so cleanly. Not to mention that the full effect of this card means that the one casting it can often be in just as much danger as the one who has it played against them. So now, nobody gets to have a good time.

WE KNOW ITS BEEN NERFED.

The biggest disadvantage new Hearthstone players have is not being aware of the presence of certain cards, and the effect they can have.

There is perhaps no greater example of this than Unleash the Hounds. While having a board full of minions is usually a good thing, Unleash the Hounds makes it a very, very bad thing. Not only does it give your opponent a one attack card (that can attack immediately) for every card you have in play, but it is the focal point of the very deadly Hunter class. That means that when paired with certain cards, the use of Unleash the Hounds can either halt, change or straight-up end the game every time it's played. Unleash the Hounds is so ridiculously useful, becoming a victim to it is best viewed as an essential part of any Hearthstone player's initiation, lest the anger it encourages causes you to launch into a fit of rage.

Ok, now we reach the point where Blizzard is just trolling the players.

The danger of Pyroblast is simple to understand. Your hero has 30 health that has to be removed to ensure victory. Pyroblast can remove 10 poinst of that health instantly and is unstoppable 99% of the time.

Oh, and it can be played twice.

If your opponent happens to draw their Pyroblast cards early, they've essentially turned your game into a race against the clock.

You know those powerful minions you either worked for hours to get, or somehow beat the overwhelming odds and unlocked at random?

The ones that you couldn't wait to play just to imagine the look of pain on your foes face the moment they see them? The Shaman's Hex ability makes them entirely irrelevant. Hex turns any minion in the game into a harmless little frog. For as long as your opponent even potentially has one of these left, your most powerful, and therefore enjoyable, minions just have to sit and wait, unless you enjoy the sight of them being neutered. Oh, and at only three cost to play, the use of this card still leaves your opponent plenty of ability to turn your supposed trump card play, into a quick victory for themselves. There are a few cards that do something similar to Hex, but none yield the same piss you off potential that this one does.

There you are staring at your Warlock opponent's single digit health with victory all but assured.

Then, just as you light a cigar in triumph, out comes Lord Jaraxxus.

It's at that moment, you know the true definition of heartbreak. This is the most unique card in the game. When played, it replaces your opponent with Lord Jaraxxus himself. Not only does this grant them a 15 health fresh start, but it also comes along with arguably the most versatile weapon in the Hearhtstone, and allows them to summon powerful bruiser minions at will; all for a disgustingly low cost. If Lord Jaraxxus did just one of these things, it would be one of the most valuable cards in the game. That it does all three earns this beauty its own wing in the rage quit hall of fame. Hearthstone is Lord Jaraxxus' world. We're all just living in it.

In truth, this entire list could have been comprised of exclusive cards to Hearthstone's Priest class without sacrificing accuracy.

The Priest is built to do two things in Hearthstone: survive, and make opponents tear their hair out. Should you manage to make it to round 10 against a Priest, you'll most likely find the one card that emphasizes both aspects of that strategy better than any other.

Mind Control allows your opponent to take the most valuable card you have on the board right now, and make it their own. While there are other cards that can conceivably accomplish this effect, none of them allow for such a clean way to take your most cherished minion, and turn it against you. Plus, Mind Control isn't necessarily meant as a strategically superior option. Instead, it's designed to enrage you past the point of reason, and will do so time and time again.