Joaquin Phoenix and Scarlett Johansson's voice (as a Siri-like operating system in Her)? Surprisingly charming and romantic. Ryan Gosling and a woman-sized doll in Lars and the Real Girl? Unexpectedly heartbreaking. An attractive German woman and a lifeless, skeletal corpse in Nekromantik? Wrong in every way imaginable.

It's a rare case of heinous on-screen coupling, of course, but the 1987 German shocker Nekromantik is proof that, sometimes, pairing a living, breathing person with an inanimate object can leads to maximum discomfort.