Who said it: Jason Schwartzman in Rushmore (1998)
Argument: Over who's going where for college.

If you're in high school, it's inevitable you'll hit the college application process and your parents will be more stressed out than you are. Temporarily alleviate their worries by telling them you're the hottest high-education free-agent this world has ever seen—until they start getting the acceptance letters and realize they have to settle for a tad less.