A real job with, like, a 401K and an email signature isn’t just a way to supplement your marijuana habit—it’s a lifestyle. Principally, it’s a lifestyle that requires you to wake up at 6:30 a.m.—every damn day—for the next four decades. If you’re mowing down noobs and screaming obscenities into a headset every night, then you’re not going to be ready for “urgent” emails and staff meetings. Grow up and get serious about life, son.