Having trouble keeping your eyes open for all those valuable Titanfall gaming hours? Wish there was a way to avoid the crushing anxiety that comes with knowing that you could be in a giant robot but instead you have to sleep? Well now there's Titanfall 5-Hour Energy in Berry flavor; we would have preferred it in “mech mango” or “blood soaked orange” but at least they'll have to pry the Xbox One controller from your cold, dead hands as you never have to sleep again!
Moreover this game-branded goody is available at that purveyor of excellent foods, garments, and all things XXXL Wal-Mart for a “limited time.” 5-Hour Energy is billed as a product to help focus and it includes phenylalanine, an ingredient found in breast milk to help fight depression. I'm already feeling better.