Valentine's Day is the romance equivalent to New Years Eve.
It's fucking amateur hour. Millions of people all being manipulated by BIG greeting card into gooning around with Hallmark cards and bouquets of roses like we're all trapped in some collective failed marriage.
It's embarrassing.
But, the greeting card industrial complex has deep pockets, and once a year FTD, CVS, and Wal-Greens collude to force millions of Americans into shelling out or looking like insensitive pricks.
Where's the honesty? Oh, it's right here. Thankfully video game characters aren't slaves to artifice in the same way we are. Here's what they're really thinking this Valentine's Day.
NSFW Valentine's Day Cards From Your Favorite Video Game Characters
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Trevor
Yoshi
Sonic the Hedgehog
J.R. Smith
Digital evidence of the last of the great romantics.