Expert knowledge of: 2mm image representation; symbolism; smiley face interpretation
Publication that needs it most: BuzzFeed

As words become progressively outdated and uncool, he who can communicate complicated emotions with three-second loops of Eli Manning's face will be king. In the not so distant future, the SAT's metaphor section will involve plugging in a fourth emoji to finish a sequence about going on vacation (spoiler alert: it's the palm tree). Somewhere in Switzerland, James Joyce is spinning in his grave.