Gothamist reports that the Office of New York City’s Special Narcotics Prosecutor announced that a plan to flood the city with millions of dollars of heroin hidden inside of couches had been stopped. Serigo Zuilanny Gordillo Joyo, the brains behind the operation who's identified as "Andres" in the press release below, ended the week on a high note by being arraigned today. Happy holidays, Andres:
During the investigation, agents learned that in January 2012 ANDRES, FERNANDO and RICHARD were planning to smuggle heroin from Colombia to Miami onboard a freight ship, the “Seaboard Pride." The fourth defendant, JAIRO, was supposed to travel from New York City to Miami to pick up the heroin and then bring the shipment back to New York City for distribution.
Instead, the shipment of heroin was seized on January 10, 1012. Agents stopped the “Seaboard Pride” in the Port of Miami and found a total of 34 packages of heroin concealed inside four couches. These couches were packed into a shipping container with another 25 couches that did not contain narcotics.
JAIRO was arrested in New York on January 12, 2012 as he prepared to travel to Miami to meet the shipment. He had planned to pick up the heroin in Miami and bring it to New York City for distribution.
NYPD Commissioner Ray Kelly, who's less than two weeks away from eating up your tax dollars with his security detail, couldn't let this moment pass without ridiculous commentary. "No matter how you couch it, illegal drugs like the heroin intercepted in this case corrupts lives and attracts violence to our neighborhoods," he joked.
Leave the jokes to the comedians.