The 10 Types of People Who Visit the Apple Store

An apple a day won't keep these people at bay.

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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Hi, my name is Brenden and I used to work at the Apple Store. Much has been written about the cult-like environment of the Apple Store. Yes, there are morning huddles (a.k.a. Daily Downloads) where you are indoctrinated with the latest propaganda. Yes, people who work there actually often get Apple tattoos following their magical training trips to Cupertino. Yes, I was once told that if I didn’t smile bigger and clap louder during a product launch, I would be sent to work in the back. Unlke most cults, where everyone wears the same colored robes, you see a few different types of adherents to the Church of Jobs.

Apple would like their brand to be synonymous with individuality. The stereotypical Apple customer is some freelance designer sitting at their repurposed wooden desk, sipping a latté, and working on their Mac. This person does exist, but he shops online, like a normal person. In my time working at the Apple Store, I saw the same types of people over and over again, and few of them were as cool as Apple customers from the commercials.  Just as you see the same types of repeat customers hanging around hardware stores and houseware outlets, the same people walk through the Apple Store’s glass doors over and over again. And yes, when a new product launches, they are all there at once. These are the 10 Types of People Who Visit the Apple Store.

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The Frazzled Personal Assistant

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The Corporate Asshole

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The Trophy Wife

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The Kindly Old Person

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The Technophile

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The Girl Who Broke or Lost Her Phone

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The Kid Who Knows More About Technology Than You

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The Apple Fan boy

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The Dude Watching YouTube Videos

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The Guy Trying to Look Cool

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