You know what's certainly scarier than the new Carrie remake that's opening in theaters this weekend? The fact that a Carrie rehash is the only theatrical option for horror fans this October, the one month of the year when scary movies are supposed to be in vogue. Hell, we'd even take another Saw movie—anything to satisfy that urge to see a (theoretically) scary movie in an unlit theatre, with a bunch of like-minded folks. Sadly, we'll all have to settle for whatever horror films are streaming on Netflix or available for physical rental at the moment, which, fortunately, leaves us with a ton of options.
For the uninformed, navigating through those options can be daunting, especially since horror movies, by design, are sold with crazy-looking DVD box covers and elaborate posters. Sometimes, the shittiest horror movies have the best one-sheets. Rather than let you waste 90 minutes watching, say, the terrible movie aided by this striking poster, allow us to make the selection process easier. When searching for something to watch this month, consult our list of The 50 Least Scary Movies of All Time, none of which deserve more than the attention you're about to give them here.