The theme of this week's Teen Mom 3 was a bit hard to decipher, because, truthfully, everyone was all over the place. The show currently has two stable couples in the form of Mackenzie and Josh, and Katie and Joey, and two monumentaly unstable couples in the form of Alex and Matt, and Briana and Devoin. In this episode, those differences in stability were never more palpable, as Mackenzie and Josh spent the episode planning to go to Mackenzie's junior prom while Matt got close to actually hitting Alex during a heated argument in front of their daughter. As always, though, the series didn't fail to make a good argument for practicing safe sex.

Mackenzie

This week, Mackenzie found herself planning for her junior prom, which she desperately wants Josh to take her to. Josh, who still hasn't taken to saying a damn WORD in front of the cameras, doesn't make any moves to ask Mackenzie to prom, and it's only when she asks him over dinner that he agrees—albeit, by shrugging and saying, "I don't care." This is good enough for Mackenzie, and she goes off dress shopping with her buddy to find something perfect. She has high aspirations for this dress: "I want to find something that fits."

When Mackenzie eventually finds a dress she likes, she asks the price—$200. She reasons that $200 is a month's worth of diapers for Gannon, and decides she wants to borrow a dress instead, because she's a mother and sacrifices need to be made. For all the times she turns a blind eye to how uninterested Josh seems to be in settling down right now, Mackenzie is actually proving to be one of the smartest girls on this show. Not only did she get on birth control, even though her mother urged her to practice abstinence instead during last week's episode, now she's deciding not to buy a prom dress so she can save the money instead. Gotta give her some props here. 

Eventually, prom night rolls around, and Mackenzie, Josh, and Gannon head over to the venue so they can all take pictures outside together before Mackenzie and Josh head inside. Cameras, of course, can't enter the school event, but it seems like they had a good time because they reemerge after all smiles before heading home to check on Gannon and head to bed. Not much real drama here compared to the other girls on the show, which is a nice change.

Briana

Poor Briana. All she wants is for Devoin to be a good father to Nova, and time and time again, he displays how utterly immature and clueless he is about parenting. In this episode, Briana and her mother get the house baby-proofed, and find that being safe bears a pretty hefty price tag: $237. Briana feels bad that her mother has to pay for it, and Briana's mother suggests Devoin pay for half—which makes sense, since Briana is raising his child and all.

Devoin, on the other hand, doesn't understand why Briana won't let him watch Nova alone at his house, even though he's done absolutely nothing to prove that he's capable of being a good parent to Nova for a day. He comes over at one point, and faces Nova as weird Mexican standoff music plays in the background—I don't think Nova likes him, maybe it's because she can sense jerks at such a young age. Anyway, Devoin asks Briana why she doesn't trust him, and Briana states the obvious: He's given her absolutely no reason to. Devoin leaves, angry, and it's not until Briana's mother calls him and bitches him out on the phone for being an asshole that he agrees to try harder and pay half the bill for the baby-proofing. No one believes he'll step up to the plate, but hey, miracles happen, right?

Alex

Alex and Matt had the most explosive storyline in this week's episode. Alex discovers that Matt has been talking to other girls on Facebook, and Matt continues to be the worst person to ever grace reality television by saying that he doesn't care how Alex feels, that she's a nag, and an overall terrible person.

Alex confronts Matt about his going behind her back, and when she does, a huge fight erupts: Matt was supposed to be watching Arabella, but he ends up standing up and beginning to walk away as Alex follows, screaming for him to get his child. Matt flies off the handle, and gets all up in Alex's face as Alex's mother and two friends of the couple look on trying to shield Arabella from this madness. It's one of the worst moments in Teen Mom history since Amber and Gary's explosive fights, and very nearly ends with Matt slapping Alex across the face before walking off.

Thankfully, however, Matt leaves, and Alex is left crying to her mother about how she's afraid that Arabella will miss her father, and that's the only reason she wanted Matt—jobless, abusive, drug-addict Matt—around.

Katie

While last week, Katie and Joey were getting into fights of epic proportions about money, this week, the both of them seem certain that they want to make their relationship work. They apologize to one another, and go off to counseling in an effort to work through their problems. They pinpoint that most of their problems arise because of money issues, so they decide it may be best to try and give each other space when they think a fight might erupt.

All in all, things end up working out for the best. The two of them move into their new apartment in the good side of town, and Katie suggests they promise not to fight in this new house. Joey agrees they won't, because she knows what pisses him off, and he knows what pisses her off. Ah, young love.

Teen Mom's reason of the week to wear a condom

While much of this episode was tamer than last week's drama-packed episode, the storyline that did strike a chord was Mackenzie and Josh's. Mackenzie is 17, and a junior in high school—she doesn't have a child to think about, let alone finances like how much money diapers and baby food cost for a month. The scene when she's shopping for her dress is supposed to show us that she's growing to be responsible (and it does, really), but it ends up being sad above all. Katie's situation, being unable to go to college because she's taking care of a kid, is equally depressing.

Mark these words, guys: Use a condom, and you won't have to miss out on major life events like spending a ridiculous amount of money on an ugly prom dress, or getting wasted during freshman year at college—rites of passage for every teen. Think of the person you'd be, if you'd never done that first kegstand during the first week of school. It's a dark thought.