The party's over Van Wilder, we're sorry to break it to you this way. Once you graduate, it's time to turn in your butt chugging card. Permanently. No more "Thirsty Thursday" drink specials for you, homie. You might not be ready for the real world, but every attractive coed that's turned down your invitation to snort Adderall in the bathroom is ready for you to move on. Bounce a quarter off the bar and chug one last $1 draft; life beckons.