New York is a wild, untamed city. You’ll observe beautiful women, hustling entrepreneurs, and sagacious artists at work in their indigenous environments. You will also encounter many, many genuses of douchebag.

Navigating NYC’s wildlife means frequently encountering this puzzling subsector of man, and every so often, shooing them away from the ankles of your female pack as they attempt to pick them off like hyenas after a gazelle. They are successful at times, sadly. 

The diligent crack team at City Guide have conducted a scientific study of the various types of douchery present in Gotham City and identified the most common species of douche that plague our fair burg. Allow us to wax scientific as we break down the most troubling examples of humanity NYC has to offer.

As you observe them in their natural habitat, you'll need this: A Field Guide to New York City Douchebags. How many douches have you spotted today?

Written by Brenden Gallagher (@muddycreekU)

Illustrations by Justyn Iannucci (@JustynIannucci

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