The circus that comes along with the Super Bowl is enough, so some drunk asshole is the last thing police in New Orleans want to deal with. Last Friday, police came across 33-year-old Osmer Hernandez as he was stumbling through the streets. Because he was feeling generous, he decided to bless them with the gift of song.
The police weren't amused because not only was Hernandez intoxicated, he was stark naked—and masturbating. When officers asked him to put on his shorts, he responded by going to work on himself. Apparently, he was so wasted that they couldn't even recognize the song. It had to have been either "Bohemian Rhapsody" or "I Touch Myself."
Once Hernandez got dressed, he was charged with public intoxication and obscenity.
[via The Huffington Post]