Where are the numbers on how many people walked into this movie expecting the deepest porno flick since Deep Throat, only to be treated to some Bond movieā€”a Bond movie starring Roger Moore no less.

The worst part is, it would take you a decent chunk of the film to realize you weren't watching a porno. A wealthy woman named Octopussy is in charge of an Octopus cult? Octopussy is also in an artifact-smuggling circus troupe? And no one gets butt-naked? That's a refund situation right there.