As Seen In: Abominable (2006)

First, the poor fool who crosses path with the pissed-off, starving Sasquatch at the center of Abominable would have to accept the fact that, yes, Bigfoot is real. And he's also a man-eating monster.

Second, he or she would need to be quick on their feet, lest Sasquatch open sesame and devour his or her entire head, a la the best moment in this otherwise dreary creature feature that should've premiered on the SyFy channel, not in limited theaters in October 2006. If only Harry and the Hendersons was law for hairy cryptids.