Chicago-Area Man Planned Bank Robbery to Pay for Going-to-Jail Party

Zero chill.

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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In a story that sounds like terrible mid-aughts comedy starring Dax Shepard (no shots), a Chicago-area man decided to rob a bank to finance his going-away party. He was already going away to jail, so he might as well send himself off with a bang, right?

36-year-old Mickey Loniello, Jr. devised his moronic plan back in 2007 with the help of two co-conspirators. Unfortunately for him, one of them happened to be a wired-up federal informant. FBI agents heard every detail, including the crew's plan to steal a getaway car for the heist because Loniello's was towed after his arrest.

The FBI even supplied the bogus .45 caliber handgun that Loniello planned to use. When he and accomplice Nathaniel Aguilar pulled up to execute the May 2007 heist, the feds were already waiting for them in the parking lot.

Last Thursday, Loniello apologized to a judge for his actions, saying that he was "not in the right state of mind" at the time of the crime. His attorney, Steven Shobat, said that Loniello was finally committed to addressing his heroin problem. 

Loniello was sentenced to a 19 month federal sentence, but has already served that time. He will now be transferred to Cook County Jail because of a pending drug case.

[via The Chicago Sun-Times]

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