Why you think it'll work: Chief Keef rhymed “like” “fight” and “night” for twenty-four straight bars and got Kanye on the remix. You could do that too, easily. Lil’ B is one of the most hype guys in the genre, but “Hoes on my dick cause I look like Jesus” is maybe the dumbest sentence ever spoken. We don’t blame you for thinking you could make it as a rapper. If 2 Chainz is worth $100K a verse, you're probably worth at least $55K.

Why it won't: Drake actually brags about selling 600K records like it’s some sort of unattainable milestone, but back in ’96 we called those “Ben Folds Five numbers.” That’s not a shot at Drake—nobody needs that guy smashing a bottle of Rose’ over anyone's head. It’s a testament to how little money there is right now in selling music. The guys with staying power have Sprite deals, design shoes, and own basketball teams. In other words, they need supplemental income to subsidize their spitting. It's a vehicle for brand building. The real money isn't in the art.