Who knew a simple drop-down menu could be responsible for such widespread irritation? A well-meaning friend can become a pariah when they insist on listing their status as "It's complicated" every time they have a one night stand. Same goes for the friend who, in a month's time, has went from "Single," to "Engaged," to "In an open relationship." We start to wonder if you've either contracted a very specific computer virus or have become a polygamist. Since we haven't seen you since tenth grade, we'll never really know, so we can only assume the worst.
Instead of making drastic changes to your profile, play it safe. Maybe instead of changing your status to divorced after an argument, you sleep on it and see how it plays out. Maybe instead of putting "It's complicated," you admit the hard truth—your girl has told you straight up she's not looking for a relationship and, sadly, you are having sex with her but you are still very single. Tough life, we know, but tell it like it is.