"Let my people go!"
I'm always nervous about those meet-ups; it's like throwing a party and being really scared that nobody's going to come. Then I see them all huddled together and they start to gravitate towards me. And then I'm like, "Let's play Red Rover!" If someone gropes me, I'll slap 'em.

 

Let’s be honest, things start with the physical. People ask me if there’s a perfect pick-up line, and I don’t think there is one.

 

OK, so that sounds totally frightening.
I was just talking to Jon Favreau about this the other day and...

I love that sentence. You should start all conversations like that.
Oh, I’ve got sentences! I was talking to Jon Favreau, Elijah Wood, and Malin Akerman the other day when…actually, we really were talking about this because they were concerned that I was so “out there” with the fans and fans think they’re my friend. They were worried that my fans would cross lines. I understand their fear, and I hope I’m not being naïve because that would not be a good ending, but—

Holy shit. Stop right there. You have to cancel out the direction you’re going in because you were about to say something really famous-last-words-y.  
God, don’t say that.

You said it!
OK, crap! I love Rocky Road ice cream! Ice cream is so delicious! Yum! Totally cancelled. 

So you’re not afraid of your fans, but what’s the kookiest incident you’ve had?
I was doing a video diary showing how I can blind-text on my BlackBerry. I was using a PA’s phone, and her name happened to be Olivia too. Fans taped it and were like, zoom in, zoom out, two seconds, stop, stop, stop, stop, frame, frame, and zooooooom. They got the return address off the screen and saw the other Olivia’s contact, and she got an influx of emails. 

Um.
OK, it might be scary, but hey, congratulations for being so tech-savvy!

To some degree, you must be used to the attention. 
I need to start being more conscious about where I go. Like, the one day in my life I went out expressly to buy condoms, the cameras were following me. 

Of course they were.
Not only was it the one day I went to expressly buy condoms, it was the one day I went to buy condoms at the Pleasure Chest. I go in, buy my condoms, and they were like, “We’re doing gift cards today.” So I’m like, “Well, since I’m here I’ll just get more condoms with my gift card.” They ask if I want another bag and obviously I was like, “No thank you, I’ll stuff all of these condoms in this tiny bag.” I walk out and click, click, click! Now there are pictures of me walking out of the Pleasure Chest with a bag overflowing with condoms. 

At least it wasn’t a gigantic 144-pack of anal suppositories or something.
No, not that day.

Surreal. Did you ever think you’d be in this position?
I’m grateful for every opportunity I’ve had. I grew up with a stepfather who was horrible. After 14 years with him, my mother, my sister, and I were able to escape, and all I’ve ever wanted was to make people laugh and to work hard and hope that whatever I get isn’t temporary.

Suck it, stepdad! 
I don’t need another person for validation. The best revenge is to get to a point where you’re no longer seeking revenge, but I grew up always hearing, “She can’t do it, she’s not smart enough, she’s not pretty enough, she’s not anything enough.”

Oof. Do you think you’ll date another actor, or are you strictly into regular dudes now?
It’s not something I think about. Right now, I just want to meet a nice guy who’s respectful and isn’t an egomaniac and isn’t super-self-involved.

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