Intoxicated Christmas shopping is rarely a good idea. Last December, Adam Klimek, sporting a Santa hat and faux fur coat, was asked to leave a store called Brown Elephant (sounds like it was for the best) in Chicago after he was reportedly walking around swearing at other customers. When an employee attempted to escort the questionably drunk Klimek off the premises, however, he apparently shoved them and made a run for it. Once arresting officers caught up with him about a block away, he proceeded to spit in the face of one and kick him in the shin before being carted off.
7. Aggravated Battery