The reveal of American Horror Story's most popular mystery is finally here, in the aptly titled "Rubber Man." The twist itself was actually more like a confirmation, but thankfully the episode didn't hinge on that. The show is still off the rails and makes no sense, but things are at least finally streamlining into an interesting final stretch.

Tate is eager to please

Unsurprisingly, we can add rape to Tate's (Evan Peters) growing list of felonies, as he has kept very busy post-death. Yup, as we and pretty much everyone else with quick-witted deductive reasoning guessed, he is Rubber Man. Did the show think that they would surprise us by going with the most obvious choice? Thankfully the episode was still plenty entertaining once the "big twist" was out of the way.

We still don't know what Tate's home life was like or what drove him to shoot up his school, but it's pretty obvious dude has mommy issues, leaving him with a burning desire to please women. So on behalf of Nora (Lily Rabe), he um, pleased Vivien (Connie Britton) back in the pilot to knock her up. Apparently condoms are still just as crucial in the after-life.

It seems Nora is just as confused as Tate [allegedly] is and barely remembers her death. All she knows is that she wants a baby (maybe she should go down to the basement) and Tate is dedicated to giving her one. First things first, that means clearing out previous owners Chad (Zachary Quinto) and Pat (Teddy Sears) when it becomes clear that their toxic, imploding relationship won't be yielding any toddlers anytime soon. It's actually Chad who bought the suit in the first place, a couple months before Halloween, back when he still had hope of salvaging their relationship by appealing to Pat's S&M interests. Well, we know how that worked out.

Everybody wants a baby

Poor Vivien. She's the centerpiece of almost everyone's agenda and thus a target on all sides. Now that she's aware that the Murder House is a haunted house she wants out, which means taking Violet (Taissa Farmiga) away. Tate the creepy dead boyfriend rapist can't have that. Nora doesn't know any other word except 'baby.' Then there's Hayden (Kate Mara), who steps up as the ringleader. She's dead, she's angry and she wants revenge. Specifically, she wants Vivien's babies.

So she gets her Danny Ocean on and ropes a bunch of the ghosts into her master plan: to get Viv consigned to a padded room. Flickering lights and the reappearance of the home invaders all result in Vivien sounding completely wild for the night to Ben (Dylan McDermott), and feeling so scared and alone that she cons Marcy the Realtor into coming over so she can swipe her gun. (American Horror Story, playing by the Roger Ebert rules of Chekhov's Gun.) This all results in a madcap sequence in which Tate as Rubber Man attacks Viv, and conveniently runs offstage so she can accidentally shoot Ben. By the end of the episode, even Luke (Morris Chestnut) can't defend her. Rubber rapists? Ghosts? Gunplay? Viv sounds like a nutcase.

Violet is the worst daughter ever

So not only is Violet OK with her boyfriend being a dead, mass murderer, now she's choosing him over her own mom? The final scene at the end was the epitome of greasy. She's the only one who knows her mother isn't batshit, but she'd rather let Tate take her virginity and play catch with Fang Baby Thaddeus than stick up for her. Maybe learning that Tate is the Rubber Man and boned her Mom will be the final straw to break his Twilight-esque hold on her. But at this rate it's doubtful she won't just shrug it off as technically being before they got together. Where is the family loyalty?!

Other Stuff

-We finally meet the ghost of Constance's husband. Hayden likes to get her Basic Instinct on with him.

-Marcy thinks Vivien scared off Mr. Escandarian the Armenian buyer. "..bit the man's head off." Well you're not far off, Marcy.

-We can probably add Constance to the list of people thirsting for Viv's baby.

-Moira (Frances Conroy) seems to be the only ghost looking out for Viv. She also gives everyone an impromptu feminist history lesson to kill time shed some nuance on everything.