Kitana’s aight. Mileena’s yuckmouth frightens us. Sonya’s too serious for our taste. Jade, though? She’s just right. Jade plays her bodyguard role like a true pro. Shao Khan doesn’t just throw his trust around to anybody (because he usually kills everyone he meets), but he trusts Jade with the well being of his daughter. No one should be so lethal with a stripper pole (okay, we meant staff), but she’s capable of doing amazing things with it. Her fatality is the stuff of horrors. Just the way we like it.