4. MATTHEW BRODERICK AS DR. NIKO TATOPOULOS IN GODZILLA (1998)
OK, so Ferris Bueller played a nerdy scientist/doctor in the horrendous remake of Godzilla—we get that. It’d be stupid to select a brute like Jean Claude Van Damme to portray a brilliant doc, and Broderick certainly looks the part. But when you’re pitting him against a dinosaur-like behemoth and a small army of baby ’zillas (don’t even get us started on how badly this flick ripped off Jurassic Park), you can’t really expect us to believe he’d ever survive. Not to mention, Broderick’s film career peaked nine years earlier in the outstanding Civil War pic Glory, so handing over a huge property like Godzilla to the guy was director Roland Emmerich’s first mistake. Making a piece-of-garbage film was his second, third, fourth, and fifth.