So, if you like nature, Sacramento is cool, and if you’re allergic to it, Sacramento will kill you. The first top ten list I ever saw my hometown mentioned on was the one for worst air quality, because coupled with all of these trees casting their sperm into the air, we sit in a valley and collect the runoff smog from San Francisco. We also collected the runoff homebuyers from San Francisco, so I think we’re a top ten city for foreclosures too, but that’s another story for another time.

Sacramento is a cheaper California alternative to the more popular cities though. A large soda from McDonald’s is exactly half the cost here as it is in L.A., not that I drink soda, or care for that matter. I just consider McDonald’s prices to be an honest standard when it comes to indexing everything. The golden arches stand for cold efficiency, and I believe they will have a strong bid for the first formally recognized world government. While we’re not on the subject really at all, I've learned that ‘no’ is one of the two most recognized words in the world. The other? Coke. Fucking soda.