TV: Snooki chalks all the haterade up to jealousy. Well, knock us over with a feather. Here we were thinking it was some pre-post-feminists just looking to subvert the dominant guidette paradigm. [Page Six]

Crime: A bank robber wearing a Darth Vader outfit knocks over a Long Island bank. Which makes us wonder, "Why hasn't this already happened?" [The NY Post]

TV: Jonathan Sadowski is set to star on CBS' upcoming blog-to-TV series, $#*! My Dad Says. Which is cool and all, but wake us when somebody picks up $#*! @Slimthugga Says, k? [Deadline]

Movies: Producer Oren Koules announces that Saw 3D will be the final film for the horror franchise. Have drugs and popcorn handy. [USAToday]

Comic-Con Madness: David Hasselhoff flexes his pipes to "I Got a Feeling" on his party bus. [Filmdrunk]