Tee Vee, where would we be without you? Probably stealing our neighbors pet. Come to think of it, we may do that anyway, and when we lure said neighbor over, this is what we'll have on the tube tonight.
SPORTS: OLYMPICS, WOMEN'S DOWNHILL SKIING & MEN'S SNOWBOARD HALFPIPE, NBC, 8 PM
• Downhill Alpine skiing is pretty dope as it is, all the more so when they show bikini pics of U.S. medal hopeful Lindsey Vonn. And if that wasn't enough, Complex homie Shaun White defends his halfpipe gold medal live around 10:15 eastern.
REALITY: MAN VS. WILD, DISCOVERY, 9 PM ET
• Bear treks across the Sahara Desert before reaching the Mediterranean, where he catches an octopus. Those of you on the East Coast might actually envy the warm weather locales.
MOVIE: WANTED, HBO SIGNATURE, 9 PM
• Common and James McAvoy star alongside some lady with lots of kids in this '08 based-on-a-comic bonanza. Gimme back my bullets!
DRAMA: NIP/TUCK, F/X, 10 PM
• With the practice (ahem) sagging, Christian and Sean resort to desperate tactics. Joan Rivers cameos as her chopped up self.
REALITY: OBESE AND PREGNANT, TLC, 8 PM
• Oh why the hell not? Don't forget the bucket of KFC and the Haagen-Dazs.