If you live in a big city, going out can be seriously draining on your wallet, especially when that slutty thing in a tank top starts asking for Patron shots. If you live out in the country, you might be the perv trying to have sex with our horses (yes, Complex has a horse-breeding biz on the side), and if you are, we're hip to your game. Either way, save yourself some money or an ass-full of buckshot and sit your broke ass at home watching some quality TV instead.
Tuesday usually means Lost and all its fly women, and we don't suggest you miss it (either real time or recorded), but there's more than usual on the TV plate tonight, everything from the Olympics to drag queens. Kick back and relax with our Complex TV Picks...
SPORTS: OLYMPICS, MEN'S ALPINE SKIING & WOMEN'S BOBSLED, NBC, 8 PM ET
• USA's Bode Miller has been going hard in Vancouver. So far, dude has won three medals in three races, successfully transforming his reputation from that guy who fucked up in Torino to that guy who's about to swoop a gold in the giant-slalom tonight. Also, don't miss women's bobsledding where racers are expected to break record speeds on the most dangerous bobsled course in Olympic history.
COMEDY: FUNNY OR DIE PRESENTS, HBO2, 11 PM ET
• From the site that brought us internet classics such as The Landlord and Paris Hilton's political attack ad, comes the series premiere of Funny Or Die Presents. Will the success of Will Ferrell and Judd Apatow's Funny Or Die translate into entertaining TV? Our money is on Yes, but tune in tonight to find out for yourself.
REALITY: MICHAEL VICK PROJECT, BET, 10 PM ET
• From the sordid brain of Michael Vick's publicist and the desperate-for-ratings producers at BET, comes the Michael Vick Project, a reality show following Vick on his quest for redemption and forgiveness in the public eye. C'mon man, who do you think you is? T.I.?
REALITY: PARANATURAL, NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC, 9 PM ET
• Complex already investigated whether or not the mythical Chupacraba exists and it seems the nerds at Nat Geo are stealing our research on tonight's series premiere of Paranatural. Turns out, joke's on them, 'cause this is the Internet, and we do no research!
REALITY: RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE, THE SNATCH GAME, VH1, 9 PM ET
• Like most shows on VH1, RuPaul's Drag Race is so bad it's hard to look away. It's like America's Next Top Model, except everyone has an Adam's apple, host included. Join RuPaul and about a dozen other contestants in the search for the next drag star—not that we're actually looking for one ourselves. *nervous laugh*