By now we all know about Bernie Madoff's corporate gangsta, with the $50 billion ponzi scheme he pulled on thousands of investors. But who woulda thunk the billionaire conman was down to get gully in the yard?

According to reports, 71-year-old Madoff floored a fellow inmate after getting into it about the state of the stock market! Sure, it's not an Aryan Brotherhood blood vendetta or enlisting the other guy into sexual servitude, but it sounds fucking jailish to us. It's tough enough for the average Joe to survive prison without ended up in a scene straight out of American History X, but it's a given that anyone with celebrity is gonna have to knuckle up from time to time; after all, "famous and scraped" > "anally raped." So in a nod to Badass Bernie and his combative compatriots, here's a brief history of other celebrity prison fights...

dahmer

JEFFREY DAHMER
When: November 28, 1994
Where: Columbia Correctional in Portage, Wisconsin
Result: Dahmer was ethered by another murder inmate after being beaten over the head with a bar weight in the gym. And by "ethered," we mean "killed." Damn, guess Wisconsin has the death penalty after all!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

downeyjr

ROBERT DOWNEY, JR.
When: February 13, 1998
Where: Los Angeles County Jail
Result: While serving time for a parole violation, Downey got into a scrap with a fellow inmate, receiving cuts to the nose. We're guessing that back then Downey would have landed the TKO if you put an eight ball between the two of them.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

gucci

GUCCI MANE
When: September 20, 2005
Where: Fulton County Jail in Atlanta, Georgia
Result: According to Gucci's lawyer, the iced-out Bart wearer was hit five or six times in the face, leaving him with bruises and cuts. And certain individuals affiliated with certain rappers whose name may or may not rhyme with "Mung Breezy" had absolutely nothing to do with it. Allegedly.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

foxy

FOXY BROWN
When: October 16, 2007
Where: Rikers Island
Result: Based on reports, it was a minor scuffle resulting in no injuries. Typical cat fight. Damn, Fox Boog, we thought BK went hard. Ya heard? Oh...ya didn't. Sorry about that.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

stanford

ALLEN STANFORD
When: September 24, 2009
Where: Joe Corley Detention Facility in Conroe, Texas
Result: After a brawl last month, the financier—yes, another Ponzi perpetrator—suffered a concussion and had to be hospitalized. His investing victims can find some solace in knowing this asshole's head was bashed in a bit. Not that it gets their life savings back, but it's a start.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

madoff

BERNIE MADOFF
When: October 12, 2009
Where: Federal Correctional Complex in Butner, North Carolina
Result: Despite early reports of Madoff landing a punch to his fellow inmate's face, it was only a shove to the ground with a "menacing stare" afterward. He DOES talk tough and he DOES do TOUGH THINGS. (Wall) Streets is watching, bitches.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

• CLICK HERE TO SEE MORE COMPLEX POLITICS & CRIME POSTS!