Hollywood's Eight Wackest Movie Werewolves

Hollywood's Eight Wackest Movie Werewolves

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In Underworld 3, the Lycans rise, but not that high.

Take a six-pack of the Silver Bullet with you if you hit the theater this weekend. Werewolves are back in Underworld: Rise of the Lycans, the third installment of the monster series. The prequel traces the origins of the beef between vampires and Lycans (werewolves). What is left unclear is why Hollywood continues to dog out werewolves with its funky looking man-beasts.

Check out the trailer to see the Lycans in all their CGI ingloriousness, then read on for eight more questionable designs from werewolf past.

DOG SOLDIERS (2002)
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• If you squint your eyes, you can barely tell they just gave a midget some stilts and stuck a wolf head on his shoulders.

SKINWALKERS (2006)
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• With a little forearm electrolysis and a nose job this bitch (hey, she's part wolf, people) would probably be a lot less pissed off at the world.

WOLF (1994)
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• The only thing this look required was fake teeth and Jack Nicholson's raging hangovers.

TEEN WOLF (1985)
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• Chewbacca was crazy pissed when he saw Michael J. Fox had stolen his whole steez, but he did have to give it up to him for his ability to throw down ferocious dunks using lowered rims and trampolines.

TEEN WOLF TOO (1987)
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• Is that Jason Bateman as a werewolf or Corey Feldman fresh out of rehab?

THE BEAST MUST DIE (1974)
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• Just before Benji hit it big with family films, he was forced to do low budget horror and snuff films to make ends meet. Doggone frightening.

VAN HELSING (2004)
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• When machines rise up to crush humanity, they will credit shitty computer-generated graphics like these with convincing them that people are not worthy masters.

AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON (1981)
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•Nothing says scary like a werewolf with manorexia.


Tags: underworld-rise-of-the-lycans, werewolf, werewolves

3 Comments | Add a comment

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    steve January 25th, 2009 at 01:45 PM

    the best one to me has been from van helsing. the rest are totally wack. now the question is, how would you guys design the perfect werewolf?

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    festie January 25th, 2009 at 02:04 PM

    you're right about most of these but you proved yourself to be a douche with the inclusion of AMERICAN WEREWOLF. that is still one of the best practical fx even 30 years later. and WOLF was a good take on the classic "wolfman" style. but you had already proved yourself to be a giant douchebag by using the phrase "wackest". i bet you buy every cd that is popular at the moment whether you like it or not. and i know you wear your ballcap sideways k-fed. or is it diddy. douchebag.

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    kp January 26th, 2009 at 01:07 PM

    can i also submit 'wolves of wall street?' http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0339918/ i managed to catch this one on TV and...wow is it terrible. no actual werewolves real or fake make it in to this film, and the moon is full for well over a month, but whatever!

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