9 Signs A Rap Album Will Definitely Suck

Watch for these red flags before you listen to something you wish you hadn't.

Not Available Lead
Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

Not Available Lead

We wish that this was a post that didn't have to be written. That would be great. We wish that all of the rap albums that came out were just wonderful, cohesive pieces of art people worked on honestly and diligently. But we can't even imagine that world. That's some sort of too-beautiful utopia that we don't think the human brain can even process. Or it'd be like nirvana. Like, if you ever found yourself in such a world, you would be released from the prison of human consciousness, and so then would have no way of experiencing how awesome it was, or of even knowing you'd attained such a state.

There probably wouldn't be racism or even any kind of hatred at all. There wouldn't be pollution. Everyone in Syria would be getting along just fine. Love and Hip-Hop wouldn't be a thing. LeBron would've stayed in Cleveland. All that. But alas, they are not. For every 400 Degreez or Aquemini there are 400,000 Kingdom Come(s) or Rebirth(s). So, for you, a cheat sheet: A list (surprise!) of ways for you to know that you should not listen to an album. Here are some telltale Signs A Rap Album Will Suck.

Written by Shea Serrano (@SheaSerrano)

RELATED: The 15 Most Disappointing Rap Albums of the Last 5 Years 
RELATED: The 25 Best Rap Beats of The Last 5 Years 
RELATED: The 25 Best Rap Verses of the Last 5 Years 

There's a genre mashup on there.

Not Available Interstitial

The album title is a play on another album title that's already famous.

Not Available Interstitial

You see a picture of the rapper with a guitar in his hands at any point before the album comes out.

Not Available Interstitial

The rapper is "bringing real hip-hop back."

Not Available Interstitial

We wrote something like 300 words out just for this. ("No you're not. You're bringing annoying back though. You're bringing annoying back like a motherfucker." So on and on.) But then I remembered: 2012 MC Shan.

Dang. :(

So here you go. #RIPmcShanLegacy

The album came out three weeks after the rapper's previous album.

Not Available Interstitial

The artist says the only reason critics don't like his album is because of politics.

Not Available Interstitial

The artist says, "It has records for the ladies, for the fellas, for the streets, for the clubs..."

Not Available Interstitial

The rapper responded to Kendrick Lamar even though he didn't name them.

Not Available Interstitial

The artist says it's "gonna be a classic."

Not Available Interstitial

Latest in Music