He Ruins Your Favorite Childhood Songs

If you grew up in the late 90's/early 2000's, two songs taught you invaluable life lessons and dominated your school dance playlists: Juvenile's "Back That AzzThang Up" and Destiny's Child's "Say My Name."

Those strings on the intro of "Back That Azz Up" are iconic, and acted as the harbinger to a four minute and thirty second respite where everything in the world was right. It's the closest thing to perfect our one true Lord and savior Jesus Christ has bestowed upon us. It's New Orleans Bounce; it's exemplary butt music of the highest hindquarter. Drake samples/covers/interpolates it on "Practice," and flips it into a down-tempo sex ballad. We felt some type of way the first time we heard it. But, then we realized that "Practice" is the Yang to "Back That Azz Up"'s Yin. Drake made "Practice" so that we had a version of "Back That Azz Up" to play during passionate love-making sessions, to soundtrack our sad strip club jaunts. And, if we're being honest, having no Mannie Fresh is the only real negative of "Practice." Shouts to all the plumber chicks.

Some songs just shouldn't be sampled, and "Say My Name" is one of them. We showed incredulity when Drake was singing "Say My Name" at live performances since 2011. And, just when we forgot all about that, he puts out "Girls Love Beyonce" two years later. GLB is decent as far as pre-album Drake loosies go. And usually, this song would be met with the eternal gas face, but James Fauntleroy graces the track. For that fact alone, you should be able to overlook any affronts to your childhood.