Andre Nickatina "Classified" (1999)
Album: Tears of a Clown
Label: Fillmoe Coleman
Producer: Dion Peete
R. Kelly once compared a girl to a Jeep, saying, "I wanna ride you." When Andre Nickatina describes how he's in a monogamous relationship with his car, some might think he's crazy, but hold on. Don't throw stones at Dodge Neons, you know? Just hear him out: "My ride, my ride/You dont fake, steal, cheat, or lie/My ride, my ride/And our relationship is classified." Oh, yes, that makes sense. I mean, you might think that his car-girlfriend is also super needy; you might think that she's not great for conversation; you might believe her Blue Book value is a pretty valid indicator of her worth. But hey, not everyone's a people person.