Chief Keef Got Arrested Again...For Speeding
Date: May 28
If you had been listening closely to the music, you might have seen this one coming. Yes, Chief Keef, among all of his other talents, is clairvoyant: “I’m rolling in that Beamer, Big Guwop in his charger/And we racing down your block,” said Keef on his recent collaboration with Gucci Mane, "Darker." In this case, “your block” meant Northfield, Illinois and “racing” (sans Gucci) meant driving exactly 110 mph in a 55.
The police were able to catch up to him that rainy night, then successfully extract the stoic Sosa from said Beamer. When they asked him about how fast he was going, Keef replied: “It’s a fast car, that’s why I bought it.” Following that poetic lesson in causality, he also made them aware that he had eight racks on his person (which would more than cover the forthcoming bond of two racks).
Finally, instead of giving the officer insurance for the BMW he was driving, he handed them insurance for his most mentioned make of vehicle, an Audi (skrrrrt). You, on the other hand, pulled up in that Honda. —Alexander Gleckman