Song: Young Money "Bedrock" (2009)

Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. What we do know, for sure, is that getting the side of your face/ear rubbed on by a dewy lady lotus is off-putting at the least. I mean...swimmer's ear...?

Pro Tip: We've heard through the grapevine that the best way to get a nicely shorn sideburn is to let your chick drag her three-day stubble vaj across them. It's like a GilletteĀ® ProGlide Styler but way better.