Grammys 2013 Predictions: Who Will Win, Who Won't, and Why

And the award goes to...

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Complex Original

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It's here: The biggest yearly event in music is goes down tonight, when the best records released between October 2011 and September 2012 will be pitted against each other for a shot at earning the artists responsible for them that much-coveted golden gramophone. Whether it's Drake and Nas competing for their first Grammy, or Bruce Springsteen looking to add another to his collection of 20, this year's ceremony looks fairly promising.

Ever since the nominations were announced, Complex Music's been poring over the list of potential winners. Debates ensued. Questions were raised. And it's all here, documented for your reading pleasure.

So, join us in predicting the 55th Annual Grammy Awards. And when the envelopes are opened later this evening, just remember: We told you so.

Predictions by Lauren Nostro (@LAURENcynthia), Insanul Ahmed (@Incilin), David Drake (@somanyshrimp), Ernest Baker (@newbornrodeo), Foster Kamer (@WeAreYourFek), and Khris Davenport (@khal)

RELATED: The Grammys' Biggest Hip-Hop Mistakes: Snubs, Errors, and Embarrassments 

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Record of the Year

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Nominees:


The Black Keys ”Lonely Boy”
Album: El Camino


Kelly Clarkson “Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)”
Album: Stronger


Fun. featuring Janelle Monáe “We Are Young”
Album: Some Nights


Gotye featuring Kimbra “Somebody That I Used to Know”
Album: Making Mirrors


Frank Ocean “Thinkin Bout You”
Album: Channel Orange


Taylor Swift “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”
Album: Red 

Predictions: 

Ernest: The Grammys love Taylor Swift. She won Album of the Year when she was like 12.

David: “Somebody That I Used to Know” is my jam. I was late on that one, I think I Shazaam’d it at a Starbucks three months after it hit number one in America. But Frank will probably get this.

Insanul: I get the feeling The Black Keys and Kelly Clarkson have no shot. I don’t think Frank has translated to the Grammy audience just yet (even though I like his song more than anyone else’s) and I feel like maybe they’ve grown tired of Taylor Swift. Which leaves Gotye and Fun. I like Gotye’s record a lot more than Fun’s, but fear all the YouTube covers have soften the impact of the song. So I’m rolling with Fun.

Lauren: The Black Keys definitely have a shot—even Clarkson. But even I have to go with T. Swift. I want Ocean to sweep—and chances are he may, but realistically Swift had a big year, too. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” really sucked in comparison to “I Knew You Were Trouble,” though. And Fun. is just The Format, with wrinkles, to be honest.

Foster: Remember: Beyonce and Jay-Z/Alicia Keys have both lost in this category to shittier songs. Odds aren’t with Frank. Also, “Thinkin Bout You” was better before it had a string section. It was more pure, less overproduced, the way that record should sound: A lonely-bedroom R & B jam. “We Are Young” is the most ruined-by-the-chorus song in recent memory. That Gotye song is a Volkswagon commercial waiting to happen. “We Are Never Getting Back Together” is the “Deez Nutz” of a post-Riot Grrl America. Team T-Swizz.

Should Win: "Thinkin Bout You"

Will Win: "We Are Never Getting Back Together"

Song of the Year

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Nominees:


Ed Sheeran “The A Team” 
Album: +


Miguel "Adorn"
Album: Kaleidoscope


Carly Rae Jespen "Call Me Maybe"
Album: Curiosity


Kelly Clarkson "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)"
Album: Stronger


Fun. "We Are Young"
Album: Some Nights

Predictions: 

Ernest: Remember this is solely about the songwriting, not how the record sounds. “Call Me Maybe” is the best written song of the bunch, and takes brilliant penmanship to invade ears the way it did, but it’s too bubblegum for the Grammys. The Grammys like those sweeping, reflective narratives, though. From Christopher Cross’ “Sailing” to John Mayer’s “Daughters,” those are the type of records that win Song of the Year. “We Are Young” wins.

David: “Adorn” deserves this. “Call Me Maybe” wasn’t a song everyone loved, it was a song everyone talked about everyone loving.

Lauren: “Call Me Maybe” is a song everyone loved—and if you didn’t, it’s because it got annoying. Carly Rae gets this—it’s the stupid song that we’ll all shake our head at when it wins but we won’t be surprised. And, to be fair, I really fuck with that song still. “Adorn” actually deserves the award, Miguel really rode out in his own lane this year and that song, no matter how overplayed, still kills it.

Foster: Eat ass maybe, Drake. I loved that song unironically. When that shit comes on the radio, it is impossible to turn off. But they usually give this to the song with the dumbest chorus, and that award handily goes to Fun. who are just, like, the worst, and who also make Carly Rae Jepsen sound like M-M-M-M-Mensa Music.

Insanul: Even my dad likes Carly Rae’s song. It was an anthem, it’s catchy, how can you not like that song? Also, I watched Mac Miller fill out this Grammy ballot for this song. He claimed, “The songs for Song of the Year are ass.” But then admitted “Adorn” and “Call Me” was great, but I believe he voted for “Adorn.” (Which is a great song as well)

Should Win: Carly or Miguel. 

Will Win: Fun.

Album of the Year

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Nominees:


The Black Keys El Camino
Label: Nonesuch


Fun. Some Nights
Label: Fueled by Ramen


Mumford & Sons Babel
Label: Glassnote 


Frank Ocean Channel Orange
Label: Def Jam


Jack White Blunderbuss
Label: Thirdman/Columbia Records

Predictions: 

Lauren: Frank's Channel Orange. As a whole, El Camino wasn’t as great as Thickfreakness, and Channel Orange was so cohesive—if only Good Kid, M.A.A.D. City was up this year. But Mumford & Sons had a big year. I’m rooting for Frank. No one cares about the rest of Fun.’s album, and Jack White’s Blunderbuss was not as strong as his other work.

Foster: The last time Album of the Year was a single-gender category with an R & B outlier, it was 1999, all women (or women-lead) acts, and the R & B outlier (The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill) beat out the four rock/adult contemporary acts (Garbage, Shania Twain, Madonna, Sheryl Crow). Not only should Frank O get this, but I think he may actually get it. And yes, Fun. is adult contemporary. That shit is Drug Store Soundtrack Music in two years.

Ernest: So, Frank Ocean had a big enough year to take this one. And the record’s unimpeachably good. It’ll be like when Arcade Fire won for The Suburbs.

David: Fun.’s label is called “Fueled by Ramen”? Gross. I can’t front like I know which of these is “best,” I am purely being a genre partisan and saying that Channel Orange is the one.

Insanul: Again, Channel Orange is my favorite of this category but I got my money on Fun.

Should Win: Channel Orange

Will Win: Channel Orange

Best New Artist

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Nominees:


Alabama Shakes
Label: ATO Records


Fun.
Label: Fueled By Ramen


Hunter Hayes
Label: Atlantic Records


The Lumineers
Label: Dualtone Music Group


Frank Ocean
Label: Def Jam 

Predictions:

Lauren: The Lumineers are popular for “Ho Hey” right? What else? And the only time I’ve heard that song is on commercials and every performance they do looks like someone put an Instagram filter over it. Frank. There’s no other choice. Who is Hunter Hayes?

Ernest: Fun. had all the hits, guys. They win this. Remember when Maroon 5 beat Kanye? 

David: Where's Chief Keef?

Lauren: WHERE'S SASHA GO HARD?

Foster: Where he should be: In jail. Also, if Frank O doesn’t win this, Odd Future is ethically obligated to run up on some “OFWGKTA IS FOR THE CHILDREN” type shit.

Insanul: Frank has an actual Best Album nod so I feel like he’s the heavy favorite.

Should Win: Frank Ocean.

Will Win: Frank Ocean.

Best Rap Album

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Nominees: 


Drake Take Care 
Label: Cash Money Records


Lupe Fiasco Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap Album. Pt. 1 
Label: Atlantic


Nas Life Is Good 
Label: Def Jam


The Roots Undun  
Label: Island Def Jam


Rick Ross God Forgives, I Don't 
Label: Def Jam


2 Chainz Based on a T.R.U. Story
Label: Island Def Jam

Predictions: 

Lauren: I just want to watch 2 Chainz’s Grammy acceptance speech. Although, if Drake doesn’t win—this is his 12th nomination, with no wins I believe—emotional thug tears will be shed.

Foster: The fact that 2 Chainz is a Grammy nominee is...something else. Lupe doesn’t stand a chance, and also, he’s probably being targeted for a drone strike right now, anyway. God Forgives isn’t Rich Forever. Nas could win, if only because of the voting contingent. But he doesn’t deserve it for this one. So: *Makes Birdman Hands*.

Ernest: Aubrey Drake made the best album of the bunch. So he should win. Simple. Also, Grammys, please televise this. We all remember watching Kanye, Wayne, and Eminem win Best Rap Album then you guys just stopped showing it. That’s ultra lame. Stop it.

David: I’m not a Drake fan per se but that deserves this one all the way. That said: a 2 Chainz Grammy win would honestly be the best thing to happen ever.

Insanul: When Drake wins this, he better pull out a crumpled ass piece of paper to prove that it’s his Grammy speech he never threw away.

Should Win: Drake

Will Win: Drake

Rapper We Want To See Win a Grammy Just For Their Speech: 2 Chainz.

Best Rap Song

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Nominees: 


Nas "Daughters"
Album: Life Is Good


Wale f/ Miguel "Lotus Flower Bomb"
Album: Ambition


G.O.O.D. Music "Mercy"
Album: Cruel Summer


Drake f/ Lil Wayne "The Motto"
Album: Take Care


Jay-Z & Kanye West "Ni**as In Paris"
Album: Watch The Throne


Wiz Khalifa & Snoop Dogg f/ Bruno Mars "Young, Wild & Free"
Album: Mac & Devin Go To High School: Music From And Inspired By The Movie

Predictions: 

Lauren: I want Nas to win so that he can bring his daughter and Kelis on stage—would that even happen? What if Kelis was wearing the green dress? If this is a possibility, he has to win. But seriously, he needs a Grammy by now.

Ernest: Seriously, Nas doesn’t have a Grammy. “Paris” is obviously the favorite to win, but I’m hoping voters are moved by Nasir’s parental narrative enough to just give him a fucking statue.

David: Wayne and Drake with “The Motto,” I guess. Although Nas probably deserves a Grammy, and if he’s gonna get an unofficial lifetime achievement Grammy it’ll be for this one.

Insanul: So I ball so hard that I boycotted the Grammys, but then I won some awards and I started going to the Grammys, and then I’m gonna win a Grammy. What’s a Throne without gold?

Foster: First of all, why has the world given Wale yet another thing to feed into his persecution complex? Next: Ty Dolla $ign helped write that Wiz and Snoop song; part of me wants it to win just so Ty can shine, but I just listened to it for the first time, and that shit is stupid-corny. It’s gonna split votes with Nas. This award usually goes to indisputable rap anthems. Jay and ‘Ye have this.

Should Win: Nas, on principle.

Will Win: Jay-Z and Kanye West for "Ni**as in Paris."

Best Rap/Sung Collaboration

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Nominees:


Flo Rida f/ Sia — "Wild Ones"
Album: Wild Ones


Jay-Z & Kanye West f/ Frank Ocean & The-Dream "No Church in the Wild" 
Album: Watch The Throne


John Legend f/ Ludacris "Tonight (Best You Ever Had)"
Album: N/A


Nas f/ Amy Winehouse "Cherry Wine"
Album: Life Is Good


Rihanna f/ Jay-Z "Talk That Talk"
Album: Talk That Talk 

Predictions: 

Ernest: Jay-Z, Kanye, and Rihanna win in this category like every year, so it’d be smart to bet on them. I want Nas to win BECAUSE NAS DOESN’T HAVE A GRAMMY. But honestly, Sia’s chorus on “Wild Ones” is so insane, I think her and Flo Rida will be the sneak attack winners.

David: Remember when we were pissed off at Ja Rule / Ashanti collabs? WTF @ us.

Insanul: Why is Future not nominated?

Lauren: Yeah, what Insanul said. FUTURE HENDRIX.

Foster: Jay-Z’s verse in “Talk That Talk” is so lazy, my friend Seth literally edited Hov out, and put the track back in his collection. If this song gets a Grammy, Jay-Z will just start recording first-take readings of Beyonce’s grocery lists as guest spots. We can’t let that happen. Also, how did “No Church” get the nomination here over “Made in America”? I think Ernest has this right: Flo Rida and Sia sneak diss the rest of the cool kids.

Should Win: Nas and Amy Winehouse, but on principle more than the actual song.

Will Win: Flo Rida and Sia.

Best Rap Performance

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Nominees:


Drake featuring Lil Wayne "HYFR (Hell Ya F***ing Right)"
Album: Take Care


Jay-Z & Kanye West "Ni**as in Paris"
Album: Watch The Throne


Nas "Daughters"
Album: Life Is Good


Kanye West f/ Big Sean, Pusha T & 2 Chainz "Mercy" 
Album: Cruel Summer


Young Jeezy f/ Jay-Z & Andre 3000 "I Do"
Album: TM:103 Hustlerz Ambition

Predictions: 

Lauren: One time I was walking in the East Village and there was a movie called "Cats in Paris" up at a theatre, so I started rapping things along the sorts of "Meow so hard/Catnip gotta find me." I Instagrammed it and it never made double-digit likes to it got deleted. Moral of the story, "N**gas in Paris" has the win. How will that look on the Grammy Award though? And will we even see this live?

David: I couldn’t believe how much radio play that Jeezy redux of “International Players Anthem” got. Weird to still be talking about “N**as in Paris” because that song feels like it came out years ago, but … despite liberally borrowing from Maceo’s “Nextel Chirp” (look it up) I gotta roll with that one.

Insanul: No way Jeezy is winning this. And I have my doubts about “Daughters” as well. Which leaves us with two Kanye songs undercutting, thus Drake will come out on top. Also, I hope they broadcast this. I want to see the presenter stumble over calling it “H-Y-F-R” instead of the real title and how they plan to tiptoe around the n-word when referring to The Throne’s track.

Ernest: Insanul, they won’t broadcast this because the Grammys don’t give a fuck about rap music. I want “HYFR” to win because Drake’s verse defines “performance” but it’s hard to compete with Jay-Z. “Paris” will win.

Foster: Look at it like this: Could Drake and Wayne perform HYFR nine times in a row at a live concert? Can any artist do that with any song, besides, maybe, like, “Achy Breaky Heart”? No doubt “Paris” deserves to win, but I agree that Kanye may be his own worst enemy. Whatever happens, “Mercy” does not deserve this win. Grammy Voters, if you care about The Children, you will not give a Grammy to a song with the word “ass-quake” in it.

Should Win: "Paris" or "HYFR" 

Will Win: "Paris."

Best Pop Solo Performance

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Nominees:


Adele — "Set Fire to the Rain" (Live)
Album: Live At The Royal Albert Hall


Kelly Clarkson "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)"
 Album: Stronger


Carly Rae Jepsen "Call Me Maybe"
Album: Curiosity


Katy Perry "Wide Awake" 
Album: Teenage Dream


Rihanna "Where Have You Been"
Album: Talk That Talk 

Predictions: 

Lauren: Wow, GIRL POWER. If Adele doesn’t win, I’ll be confused. She’s nominated for a live song. I don’t think Katy Perry deserves it, I’d be happy for Clarkson, and Carly Rae should get best song. But, while I am (was) Rihanna’s biggest supporter, you can’t put her voice up against Adele’s. It’s not fair.

Ernest: Rihanna deserves it. Adele will win it. The Grammys are not giving Perry, Rihanna, or Jepsen a statue for vocals. Only potential upset would be Clarkson taking instead.

David: I’m not Rihanna’s biggest supporter, but this song was low-key one of Rihanna’s best songs. Great production pretty incredible balance of fragility and power. I do like Adele too, and her singing voice is impeccable, so it’s a close call, but “Where Have you Been” is so dynamic.

Should Win: Rihanna. 

Will Win: Adele.

Best Pop Duo/Group Performance

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Nominees:


Florence and the Machine "Shake It Out"
Album: Ceremonials


Fun. f/ Janelle Monáe "We Are Young"
Album: Some Nights


Gotye f/ Kimbra "Somebody That I Used to Know"
Album: Making Mirrors


LMFAO "Sexy and I Know It"
Album: Sorry For Party Rocking


Maroon 5 f/ Wiz Khalifa — "Payphone"
Album: Overexposed

Predictions: 

Foster: Have any of you actually listened to “Shake It Out”? That song makes me want to have twenty beautiful earth children and smudge a three-mile radius with burning sage and pixie glitter and hang my head out the window of a car speeding through the Blue Ridge like a basset hound, jowls flapping in the wind.

Lauren: “Beautiful earth children.” I cannot believe LMFAO is nominated for a Grammy. Although 2012 was the Year of the Troll. I seriously fuck with Maroon 5 and because Wiz is on it, “Payphone” isn’t bad. I also just started listening to that song last month, so who knows. Adam Levine is a Grammy favorite, too. But yes, Foster, in terms of talent, Florence wins.

Ernest: The Gotye and Kimbra song will win. They’ll be upset in the Big Four categories, but there’s no way they’re not taking something home for their monster of a song.

David: I would take “Sexy and I Know It” over that horrible Maroon 5 song any day. It’s also more fun than Fun. LMFAO are probably done at this point but I’m not mad at them, it was the Jock Jams for our new era. “Shake It Out” is pretty great and epic but “Somebody That I Used To Know” is the only one of these I Shazaam’d so it wins.

Insanul: That LMFAO and that Maroon 5 songs are terrible. “Shake It Out” is by far the best song on here, but again I’m riding with Fun. since I think they have the best shot to win.

Should Win: "Shake It Out"

Will Win: "Somebody That I Used To Know."

Greatest Description We've Ever Heard of LMFAO: "Berry Gordy's final 'fuck you' to music."

Best Pop Vocal Album

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Nominees: 


Kelly Clarkson Stronger 
Label: RCA Records


Florence and the Machine Ceremonials 
Label: Universal Republic


Fun. Some Nights 
Label: Fueled by Ramen


Maroon 5 Overexposed 
Label: A&M/Octone


Pink The Truth About Love
Label: RCA Records

Predictions:

Lauren: Ceremonials because vocally, Florence is a goddess. But can we talk about Pink for a second? She had Lily Rose Cooper (former Lily Allen) on it and I like that a lot but why hasn’t Pink’s music progressed? She’s still talking about how she hates people, her performances are all aerobics and her “Slut Like You” song was just so boring. I’m a little surprised she’s even nominated. Florence, you better get this.

Ernest: Adam Levine and Maroon 5 had so many hits on that album. They got it.

David: Where’s Chief Keef?

Foster: Leaving whatever neighborhood Fun. just helped gentrify.

Insanul: Florence ought to win, but Fun will win.

Should Win: Florence and The Machine.

Will Win: Maroon 5. 

Won't Win: Chief Keef.

Best R&B Album

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Nominees:


Robert Glasper Experiment Black Radio
Label: Blue Note


Anthony Hamilton Back to Love
Label: RCA Records


R. Kelly Write Me Back
Label: RCA Records


Tamia Beautiful Surprise
Label: Plus 1 Music Group


Tyrese Open Invitation 
Label: Voltrone Recordz

Predictions:

Lauren: According to Twitter, Tyrese has had a hard year. Give it to him.

Ernest: Feels so typical, but R. Kelly deserves it. No one talked about Write Me Back, but it has jams.

David: Tamia has been consistently underrated as an R&B presence for years. I was not a huge fan of the Glasper project. Would like to see Tamia win, have trouble seeing them go with anyone other than Kells though.

Insanul: Lolz at Tyrese. Let’s just give it to Kellz. He’s been through so much.

Should Win: R. Kelly.

Will Win: R. Kelly.

BUT MY BODY? MY BODDDDYYYYY'S TELLING ME YEEEESSSSSSS.

Best R&B Song

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Nominees:


Miguel "Adorn"
Album: Kaleidoscope Dream 


Tamia "Beautiful Surprise"
Album: Beautiful Song


Trey Songz "Heart Attack" 
Album: Chapter V


Anthony Hamilton "Pray for Me"
Album: Back To Love


Elle Varner "Refill" 
Album: Perfectly Imperfect

Predictions:

Ernest: Once again, hard to argue against Miguel.

David: I was a Anthony Hamilton fan at one point but his music had some serious diminishing returns impact for me. Miguel’s song is great but ... I love you Elle Varner. Call me.

Insanul: WHERE IS FRANK OCEAN?

Foster: Insanul, have you even listened to “Adorn”? Frank Ocean is Bigger Than R&B, for better or worse. And as far as the fundamentals of R&B are concerned, I think Miguel has this locked. Miguel is the rare artist who earned comparisons to Marvin Gaye, where the people who made those comparisons weren’t looked at completely crazy-like. That’s worth something.

Lauren: It's worth something but so is the fact that everyone is, and has, slept on Elle Varner—who deserves a Grammy. Miguel should get R&B Album of The Year because the entire work was beautiful, and he deserves this, too. But damn, Elle Varner.

Should Win: Miguel or Elle Varner

Will Win: Miguel

Best R&B Performance

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Nominees:


Estelle "Thank You"
Album: All Of Me


Robert Glasper Experiment f/ Ledisi "Gonna Be Alright (F.T.B.)"
Album: Black Radio


Luke James "I Want You"
Album: N/A


Miguel "Adorn"
Album: Kaleidoscope


Usher "Climax"
Album: Looking 4 Myself 

Predictions: 

Ernest: Miguel's “Adorn” got the Song of the Year nod. It wins by default.

David: Usher's "Climax" was incredible. Competition from “Adorn,” but not much.

Foster: Ernest, I really hope you’re wrong. “Climax” was written with Diplo and Nico Muhly, who is, you know, an actual composer. It also perfectly reflects the way music is trending right now: Under the growing influence of R&B and splashed with EDM, besides which, it’s just a stunning, brilliant song. I’m surprised this didn’t get more nominations. And here, I’m dropping real talk: “Climax” is a better piece of songwriting than anything on Channel Orange. That doesn’t mean Channel Orange isn’t better as a whole piece of work, but come on: Frank Ocean is no Usher, and “Thinking About You” is no “Climax.” 

Lauren: Absolutely disagree. "Climax" was great but it's not a better piece in terms of songwriting, especially for Usher, whose catalog has its very own section for heartbroken ballads—and I totally fuck with that. It was great, it still is great, and it deserves to win. But so does "Adorn" because of the year, and progress, Miguel has made.

Should Win: "Climax" or "Adorn"

Will Win: "Adorn"

Best Traditional R&B Performance

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Nominees:


Anita Baker "Lately"
Album: N/A


Beyonce "Love on Top"
Album: 4


Melanie Fiona "Wrong Side of a Love Song"
Album: The MF Life


Gregory Porter "Real Good Hands" 
Album: Be Good


SWV "If Only You Knew"
Album: I Missed Us 

Predictions: 

Lauren: Beyonce's "Love On Top" best song of 2011/2012 also probably 2013, life.

Ernest: “Love On Top” is honestly amazing. And really, who’s gonna look at their ballot and not vote for Beyonce?

David: Where’s Elle Varner? The Anita song is pretty cool, I like that or the Bey track the most. Have trouble seeing a non-Beyonce victory just because of name recognition, though.

Insanul: Again, define “Traditional.” Also, SWV getting Grammy nominations in 2013.

Foster: There are four key changes in “Love On Top.” That shit is amazing. It deserves to win, and will win.

Should Win: "Love On Top"

Will Win: "Love On Top"

Key Changes In This Prediciton: None.

Best Urban Contemporary Album

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Nominees:


Chris Brown Fortune
Label: RCA Records


Miguel Kaleidoscope Dream
Label: RCA Records


Frank Ocean Channel Orange
Label: Def Jam Records

Predictions:

Lauren: I love you Miguel, you deserve the world—but please let Frank Ocean win this, just to watch CB stew in his seat. Please.

Ernest: Lolz at an Urban Contemporary category. Frank Ocean is a lock, though. David:

Insanul: Finally, Frank Ocean is nominated in the Best Album category.

Foster: I think Ins has some weird form of Stockholm Syndrome with regards to OFWGKTA. But my god, you want to talk about trolling? Give this award to Chris Brown and see what happens. Either way, I’m looking forward to this just to see the Grammys cut to Brown when Ocean takes it.

Should Win: Frank Ocean

Will Win: Frank Ocean

Best Dance Recording

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Nominees:


Avicii "Levels"
Album: N/A


Calvin Harris f/ Ne-Yo "Let's Go"
Album: 18 Months


Skrillex "Bangarang"
Album: Bangarang


Swedish House Mafia f/ John Martin "Don't You Worry Child"
Album: N/A


Al Walser "I Can't Live Without You"
Album: N/A

Predictions:

Ernest: I once wanted to murder a DJ for not playing “Levels” in a timely fashion. The song that inspired those feelings deserves the award. Unfortunately, the Grammys have a strong preference for sappy stuff so “Don’t You Worry Child” will win. And that’s a good song. It’s just half the song of “Levels.”

Foster: And the award goes to...that song that goes “WUB WUB WUB WUB WUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBBBBBB WUB.” But Calvin Harris actually makes great dance songs. How was “Sweet Nothing” not nominated?

Khal: “Sweet Nothing,” was a single, missed the cut by a hair. Or they just knocked him out so Al Walser could get his chance to shine.

Insanul: “Levels” will win because it’s not just a song that goes “WUB WUB WUB” but a song that features some actual great singing and at least a bit of easily discernible song structure. If EDM is really going to be a lasting genre, it needs to score actual pop hits and “Levels” is one of those.  

David: Insanul is insane for saying “If EDM is really going to be a lasting genre” but I digress. I think “Levels” deserves to win because it was the biggest anthem of all of these, no? I like most of these songs to be completely honest. If you’re an old head like myself the Skrillex live experience can be a serious conversion experience.

Lauren: Khal, you gonna let Foster make fun of EDM like that?! Avicii “Levels.” Without a question. I wish Swedish House Mafia’s “Save The World” was up but, I think that didn’t make the cut last year. And David, the old head, lol.

Should Win: "Levels"

Will Win: "Levels"

Wub Wub? WUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBBBBBBBWUB.

Best Dance/Electronica Album

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Nominees:


Steve Aoki Wonderland
Label: Ultra Music


The Chemical Brothers Don't Think
Label: Astralwerks


Deadmau5 > Album Title Goes Here <
Label: Mau5trap Recordings


Kaskade Fire & Ice 
Label: Ultra Music


Skrillex Bangarang 
Label: OWSLA

Predictions:

Lauren: I’m not even going to front—I haven’t listened to any of these in full. I used to really be into The Chemical Brothers' “Galvanize” but, to be fair, Q-Tip was on it so, let’s be honest, I don’t know these catalogs in full.

Khal: I wonder when they’ll figure out that Skrillex hasn’t put out an official album yet.

Ernest: The Chemical Brothers win off OG status. Grammy voters don’t even know who these other people are.

David: Which one of these records has the freshest breaks?

Insanul: I have no idea who’s gonna win but I hope Deadmau5 does. Whether he’s got the mask or not, that’s going to be one awkward ass acceptance speech...

Foster: I just want Steve Aoki to win so Cory Kennedy can be thanked in a speech in front of millions of people, and that way, Nylon magazine can end, and New York can finally seal the book on 2004-2009-era hipsterism. It’s a terrible sacrifice for the sake of psychological closure, sure, but one well worth investing in.

Should Win/Will Win: Like we have any idea. We'll go with "The Chemical Brothers" and see what happens.

Best Rock Performance

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Nominees:


Alabama Shakes "Hold On"
Album: Boys & Girls


The Black Keys "Lonely Boy"
Album: El Camino


Coldplay "Charlie Brown"
Album: Mylo Xyloto


Mumford & Sons "I Will Wait"
Album: Babel


Bruce Springsteen "We Take Care of Our Own"
Album:Wrecking Ball

Predictions:

Lauren: Bruce Springsteen. He has to win.

Ernest: Bruce Springsteen will win for the same reason Alec Baldwin wins SAG awards. He’s awesome and all of his voting peers in the business love him.

Insanul: Either Black Keys or Mumford but probably Mumford. No one else has a shot, not even the Boss.

Should Win: The Boss.

Will Win: The Boss, Baby Boomers, People Who Buy CDs at Starbucks.

Best Rock Song

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Nominees:


Jack White "Freedom at 21"
Album: Blunderbuss


Mumford & Sons "I Will Wait"
Album: Babel


The Black Keys "Lonely Boy" 
Album: El Camino


Muse "Madness"
Album: The 2nd Law


Bruce Springsteen "We Take Care of Our Own" 
Album: Wrecking Ball 

Predictions: 

Lauren: Why isn’t “Sixteen Saltines” on here?

Ernest: Bruce Springsteen is taking this, too. Song is fire.

David: Bruce Springsteen recording during an election year is my nightmare. Why the Black Keys and not The Caesars? Or The Hives? Anyway I think Mumford & Sons is somehow the most listenable group on this list I guess that’s my vote.

Insanul: Repeat ballot: Mumford.

Foster: Liveblog of me listening to Mumford & Sons for the first time:

0:04 - O Degrassi, Where Art Thou?
0:21 - So this is who we got to replace Garth Brooks?
1:05 - In the pantheon of songs about waiting for people to come around, I really hope this is the moment in which people starting caring about literalism as a trap to be avoided.
2:48 - First sign of genuine pop songwriting talent in this song: the piano underlining, which leaves about as quickly as it comes in.
3:19 - So this is who the Grammys think they got to replace the Arcade Fire with?
3:42 - I’m okay with this. You know in Top Chef, when they’re telling a chef, “There’s a lot going on here” in that dish? And you don’t know how you’re supposed to feel about it? Or maybe that’s just how I feel about the banjo in general. The banjo is a lot to deal with.

Muse deserves to win, Springsteen will win. Mumford and Sons is, I don’t know, it’s bluegrass for people who buy CDs at Starbucks, I guess.

Should Win: The Boss.

Will Win: The Boss, Subaru Drivers, Ride-or-Die Suburbanites.

Best Rock Album

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Nominees:


The Black Keys El Camino 
Label: Nonesuch


Coldplay Mylo Xyloto
Label: Capitol


Muse The 2nd Law 
Label: Warner Brothers Records


Bruce Springsteen Wrecking Ball
Label: Columbia Records


 Jack White Blunderbuss
Label: Columbia Records/Thirdman

Predictions:

Lauren: To quote @somanyshrimp, IDGAF. But if I had have some fucks leftover at this point, I'd say Coldplay because their album name reminds me of axolotl, which is a salamander of sorts that is always smiling and has a really cool head.

Ernest: It’s pretty depressing that this is where rock is at right now. Not even that these picks suck so much, but it’s just like, the same people over and over and over.

David: Are there any other rock bands still recording?

Foster: [Sighs] I know we sound like haters, but is it hating if the thing you’re actually hating on is mediocre? Like, when was the last time you heard someone—even your parents—say to you, You know what I’ve been listening to a lot? The [Insert One Of These Bands] album. Of all of these bands, the Black Keys record—a great record—is the only one that I even kind of give a shit about. So it should win.

Insanul: If you got the Best Album nod, then you win your Best Album of Your Genre category by default. So it's Black Keys or nothing.

Should Win: Black Keys.

Will Win: Black Keys, or the status quo. Definitely one of the two.

Best Alternative Music Album

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Nominees:


Fiona Apple The Idler Wheel Is Wiser Than the Driver of the Screw and Whipping Cords Will Serve You More Than Ropes Will Ever Do
Label: Epic/Clean Slate


Björk Biophilia
Label: One Little Indian/Nonesuch


Gotye Making Mirrors 
Label: Universal Republic


M83 Hurry Up, We're Dreaming
Label: Mute


Tom Waits Bad as Me
Label: Anti Records 

Predictions:

Ernest: Fiona Apple not winning this is impossible.

David: Fiona. Fiona >>>

Insanul: Define “Alternative.” Also, if Fiona doesn’t win I’m throwing my iPhone at my TV. Also, WHY DIDN’T FIONA GET A BEST ALBUM NOMINATION?!?!?!

Foster: So I don’t have to hear Music Critic Twitter bitch about this bullshit for the next four years (or however long it will take Fiona to record a new album), please, please, please give this to Fiona Apple.

Lauren: So, Fiona can and should win—but I really loved M83, it just didn't have the lasting power of a year because I'm sitting here struggling to name other songs on their album 

Should Win: Fiona Apple

Will Win: Fiona Apple

Neighborhood in New York Most Likely To Be Set On Fire if Fiona Apple Doesn't Win: Park Slope, followed closely by Astoria.

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