Date: January 11

When you go to get a tattoo, you're supposed to be asked a number of questions. Like, "Are you under the influence of alcohol or drugs?" Or, "Why in the world would you get KANYE tattoo'd across both butt cheeks?" Or, "Will this be meaningful in 10 years, or 5 years, or hell, tomorrow?" Or, "I know Kanye will love it, but hey, what if by some crazy chance, he changes his mind?" Or, "Wait, you changed your name to Kanyeresa West and this can be construed as tattooing your own name across your butt cheeks?" Or, "Who tattoos their own name across their butt cheeks?" Or, "You're not gonna tell anyone about this, right?"