The title is Life Is Good. Have you gotten to the point where you feel you’ve gotten some sort of mastery of your life?

Yeah, in some ways. In some ways, not yet, but I’m on my way. Financially, I haven’t fixed that yet. I still have a place to go. There’s a place that I see myself being, financially, by the fall. There’s plans that I have, that I’m close to accomplishing. Those were setbacks. Those things were setbacks that were my fault. No matter who screwed it up for me, it was my fault for letting them screw my shit up.

So it’s getting more precise.

Yeah. I’m starting to see how I can do things and make it mean more... I never liked dealing with money. I never liked dealing with money with friends. It comes between real shit. Money is a business. Money is a different beast.

 

There’s nothing wrong with liking money. There’s nothing wrong with loving money. Sometimes I have moments when I love it. There’ll be a day that I love money, but overall I just like it.

 

Friendship, loyalty and love is the real shit. Money is the other shit. I have one way of dealing with money, and then you have educated people, who know how to deal with money, and we have some conflicts there. I’ve made more than I wanted to make, too much more than I wanted to make.

That’s ill. A lot of people would say, “Yo are you insane? How can you make more than you want?”

The thing about it is that I still don’t feel like I’ve made enough or done the right things to help other people, who like money more than I do. That’s what upsets me. I still wasn’t able to help people who need money or like money more than I do. There’s nothing wrong with liking money. There’s nothing wrong with loving money. Sometimes I have moments when I love it. There’ll be a day that I love money, but overall I just like it.

You’ve found things outside of money that you love more.

Yeah. It’s like in the movie Wall Street, my man Gekko says, “Pay attention. Money’s a jealous bitch. Either you’re going to pay attention to her, or she’ll find someone else that will.” And mine has definitely found other people who would appreciate her more [Laughs].

I’ve definitely neglected her and abused her. I’ve let people take her from me. I let a person take her from me, and I don’t mean my ex-wife, I mean some bad business from like, six years ago, that’s affecting me now. And I take responsibility for it, because at the end of the day, it’s my problem.

But I still see something like that as something that I have to fix, because if you don’t fix money, it’ll fix your ass, in the wrong way. I can’t help the amount of money I make. I can’t help it. This is just what it is, and it’s just fucked up when money’s involved in divorce. And I don’t give a fuck. I can’t take it with me, so someone can take the money.

Talking about divorce, it’s like anyone that I’m married to, if I give you my life, I give you my heart, I love you, then my money is nothing. You can have it all. It’s nothing. It’s just sad that when you’re dealing with love and life and marriage, that marriage is a contract. It’s a business deal. That messes up people.

After you say “I do,” everything changes.

Yeah.

You can’t see what people expect out of marriage before you marry them. It only comes out after the deed is done.

Right.

Did you see a problem immediately?

Yeah, but it was a problem I was attracted to. It was rock and roll. I saw her as Courtney Love, so to speak, but then I also saw something else in her. I saw her as a mahogany queen. I saw us as a beautiful thing. I saw us as inspiration.

I think we inspired people with love. People saw us get married, and they weren’t really seeing hip-hop artists get married. So a lot of people came at me crazy, and this, that and the other, but I think overall, we were inspiring people to love and that love is good.

 

Talking about divorce, it’s like anyone that I’m married to, if I give you my life, I give you my heart, I love you, then my money is nothing. You can have it all. It’s nothing. It’s just sad that when you’re dealing with love and life and marriage, that marriage is a contract. It’s a business deal. That messes up people.

 

It’s the business of marriage, and if you’re not on top of it, it falls apart. It’s a daily work. I saw that there were too many things—because she was younger than me—that she couldn’t handle. There was a lot that was thrown at her that she couldn’t handle. Like I was saying earlier, there’s a lot that I could tell my kids, but they’ve got to fish it out for themselves.

Every night, she was in bed with Harvard. She was sleeping with Harvard. She had all the answers, but on her part, I needed something more from her, that she either wasn’t ready or didn’t know how to provide, and her being younger than me and not seeing all the things I had seen...Me explaining it to her is one thing, but her experience...

It’s an intellectual thing and not an emotional thing.

Yeah. I was on a journey that wasn’t really...She was on her journey, I was on mine, at some point. So yeah, in the beginning, I said, “There’s parts of this that might not work,” but there was a beautiful part of it, too. I had a great time. For the most part, I had a great time being married. It was amazing. She’s an amazing woman.

I thought she handled it, in terms of the media, very well. She was never throwing daggers at you.

No, she was. Over Twitter, and there were things...

OK. In an article, she said that she wasn’t going to say anything bad about you.

That was later, because she saw how bad it was.

The response?

Yeah, the response was not good. But yeah, there was bad tweets. I just think she was angry. She was lashing out at anyone, and anyone she would lash out at, people thought she was automatically talking about me.

My daughter would be calling me like, “Dad. I’m on my way to school, and they’re talking about you on the radio.” My daughter wanted to tweet back and shit, and I just told her take the higher road. So yeah, it was ugly.

How is it now?

It’s gotten a lot better.

So there’s no issues? You see your son as you please?

That side is not great yet, but it’s working towards being that way. And I know she’s a new mom, and I’m busy and she’s busy. From what I see, she’s being a good mom, and I feel like it’s working toward a great place. There was a time when I couldn’t see him at all. It was terrible. The divorce was fresh.

There was still a lot of emotions out there.

Yeah.

Did you ever get to a point where you hated her?

No. I got to a point where I was like, “Did she always hate me?” and “Did she ever love me at all?” I’ve got to admit, I did feel like that. But she did. She did love me.

You kind of understand that now.

Yeah.

The backlash is because she loved so hard.

Exactly. They wind up taking it out on you. A lot of divorces are bad because a woman is just being vindictive. She’s not after the money, she just wants you to hurt the way she was hurt.

Could you ever see yourself getting married again?

At this point, not today. Not right now. I’m just enjoying life and taking it each day, looking at each day like, “This is beautiful.” I’m having a good time. I’m not going to bring anybody in to mess that up. You come around looking like you’re going to mess this good time up, you’re out of here, fast [Laughs]. That’s one thing about my patience level. It’s like, no way. I’m not sacrificing my happiness for nobody and their drama. No way.

And you can read it quicker.

I see it a mile away.

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