We owe today's birthday boy a lot: our country, our freedom, our super-sized fries, and even our love for football. Without Thomas Jefferson, the American people might not even exist today. That said, we think the author of the Declaration of Independence deserves some kind of honor, don't you? Thus, we're traveling back to his home state of Virginia and rallying up its hottest women to celebrate with us. After all, it's not a party without women—it's a sausagefest.