A Field Guide to NYC Douchebags

The Murray Hill Bro Douche

Yes, that is a Yankees Cap. This guy is equally loyal to all of his favorite sports teams: the New York Yankees, Dallas Cowboys, and Miami Heat. He has loved them ever since he was a little douche, growing up in Ohio, New Jersey, or whatever flyover state he is from, begging the coach not to cut him from the JV soccer squad. He now works in marketing, or communications, or social media, or some other thing that even he is bored to tears describing. All he's interested in is talking about is how much he can bench press, his fantasy football team, and how he knows that the waitress in the referee uniform was definitely checking him out. [Editor's note: she wasn't.]

1. Baseball cap of mainstream, big market team
2. Arm sore from fist pumping 
3. Sandals with jeans, showing off unkempt feet 
4. Popped polo, sometimes several layers of them 
5. $9 Bud Light, which he chose because it is "refreshing"

Related Douches: The Douche-Designating Douche, The Too Young to be Such a Douche Douche

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