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25. XFINITY Live! Philadelphia

25. XFINITY Live! Philadelphia

Address: 1100 Pattison Ave.
Website: xfinitylive.com

This monstrosity, basically six sports bars crammed into one venue, opened at the end of March. XFINITY Live! Philadelphia, in addition to being much fun to write out, is a place for bros to chill before sporting events, and then return to to get angry-drunk after said (sad) sporting events. The opening of this venue featured concerts by Bruce Springsteen, who, along with Jimmy Buffett, Bon Jovi, and Steve Perry, comprise the faces on a musical Mount Rushmore, where instead of inspiring patriotism, the music of each mug inspires nerve-wracking singing from men who can't express affection for each other by normal means. There is too much douche to take in here: a mechanical bull, beer wenches in ass-less chaps, unreasonably loud bro tunes, bottle service, and an endless array of plasma TVs. In time, this place will give Philly douche heavyweights a serious a run for their money. Don't sweat being all the way down at the bottom, XFINITY Live! Philadelphia—you are Rookie Douche of the Year!

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