17. The Plough and the Stars
Address: 123 Chestnut St.
This Irish pub illustrates the great paradox of Philly nightlife. On a Wednesday night, this is a mild-mannered bar populated by middle-aged folks enjoying a nice dinner while listening to the sweet sounds of accordions and fiddles at the same (damn) time. But when Friday night comes, party vans equipped with splashing neon and stripper poles pour across the bridge from Jersey, the beer tub wenches man their stations, and epic douchery ensues. Flee Old City on Friday nights! Don't make us say we told you so when you're lying in a gutter, overwhelmed by the smell of cheap cologne and various hair products.