According to bastion of reliable journalism National Enquirer, Morgan Freeman is hoping to marry 27-year-old E’Dena Hines. Who also happens to be his step-granddaughter. As the gossip outlets have reported, the alleged affair is the reason for the collapse of his 24-year marriage (though E’Dena is not the woman who was in the car with Freeman the night he got into that car accident last year).

For the moment, let’s ignore the 45-year age difference between the two–as far as we’re concerned, MF Doom has earned the right to bone 18-year-olds if he so chooses–and focus on the truly creepy part of it. You’re marrying fam, fam! The thing is, while Morgan is the latest to climb his own family tree, he’s by no means the first. Check out some other quasi-incestuous cases that made us cringe…

WHO: RUDY GIULIANI, POLITICIAN
SCANDAL: His first marriage, which lasted for 14 years, was to his second cousin Regina Peruggi. According to Giuliani, he didn’t know she was his second cousin for a decade and a half—but knowing she was a third cousin was perfectly acceptable? In the Republican tradition it is. Probably.

WOODY ALLEN WEIRDO SCALE:

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WHO: CHELSEA CUMMINS, TAEKWONDO CHAMPION
SCANDAL: Cummins had a two-year affair (which resulted in an abortion) from age 17 to 19 with her long-lost father. *cue Deliverance theme* No extenuating circumstances here: He was her father, he impregnated her, and then went on to sex up her mother again. Last name Cummins—coincidence? Hardly.
WOODY ALLEN WEIRDO SCALE:

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WHO: ALBERT EINSTEIN, SCIENTIST
SCANDAL: He married his first cousin in 1923. We’ll cut Al some slack—the pickings for an eccentric genius in Berlin in the early 1900s were a bit slim. Plus, y’know, E=MC^2 and all that.
WOODY ALLEN WEIRDO SCALE:

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WHO: FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT AND ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, PRESIDENT AND FIRST LADY
SCANDAL: FDR and Eleanor were fifth cousins once removed. True, it was legal, But isn’t it a little strange that Eleanor didn’t even have to change her last name (maiden name: Roosevelt) upon marrying? Or that she LOOKED LIKE A FUCKING DUDE?
WOODY ALLEN WEIRDO SCALE:

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WHO: WOODY ALLEN, DIRECTOR/ACTOR
SCANDAL: Mia Farrow ended her 12-year relationship with Allen after discovering nude photos of her adopted daughter, Soon-Yi, in his apartment. Ouch. Allen later married Soon-Yi and is with her to this day. Whatever works!
WOODY ALLEN WEIRDO SCALE:

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WHO: GEORGE-MICHAEL BLUTH AND MAEBY FUNKE
SCANDAL: O.K., it’s not real, but Michael Cera’s character in Arrested Development is in love with his cousin. Who may or may not actually be his cousin. Good thing Cera’s too much of a eunuch to ever consummate any relationship, let alone a slightly questionable one.
WOODY ALLEN WEIRDO SCALE:

No one can really prepare for the emotional rollercoaster that comes with leaving your lady. But if you’ve seen cautionary tales like Fatal Attraction with Glen Close'the O.G. of crazy-ass G.F.’s'then you might be more prepared when they go balls to the wall. Check out these other psycho exes and watch your back…

LARA FLYNN-BOYLE IN WAYNE’S WORLD

FATAL ATTRACTION FACTOR:

Wayne dubbed her “Psycho Hose Beast,” but Laura Flynn-Boyle’s character Stacey just didn’t know how to take a hint. Sure, the gun rack gift was a little freaky, but after watching her fall through a skylight and ride a bike into a parked car at full speed, it became clear that the only person Stacey was capable of hurting was herself.

DEMI MOORE IN DISCLOSURE

FATAL ATTRACTION FACTOR:

Regardless of what human resources says, everyone fucks their co-workers. But we had to stay away from the company ink for months after watching this corporate thriller where Demi Moore sues her rival executive/ex-boyfriend Michael Douglas for sexual harassment after she seduces him. That’s why we started taping all our sexual encounters. Strictly for legal purposes.

LYNN WHITFIELD IN A THIN LINE BETWEEN LOVE AND HATE

FATAL ATTRACTION FACTOR:

Playboy Martin Lawrence got a wake up call when he started treating Lynn’s character Brandi like any other jump-off. This movie is proof that saying “I love you” to get in those panties will only end with you being half-dead at the bottom of your swimming pool. But Martin had fair warning'when a women confesses that she murdered her last husband, for God’s sake, please believe her.

UMA THURMAN IN MY SUPER EX-GIRLFRIEND

FATAL ATTRACTION FACTOR:

As long as you’re armed with a restraining order and a gun, you should be safe from most ex-encounters. Unless your ex happens to be invincible and can fly. Our advice: just start dating a female super villain. That would be a hell of a cat fight.

CAMERON DIAZ IN VANILLA SKY

FATAL ATTRACTION FACTOR:

The thing about crazy people is that sometimes you don’t realize how crazy they are until you’re careening head-first off of a bridge. Unfortunately, it didn’t occur to Tom Cruise that Cameron’s character was 7:30 as fuck until she purposely staged a car crash, turning him into a permanently deformed monster. Next time take the subway.

“People will be blown away and even shocked. Penelope and Scarlett go at it in a red-tinted photography dark room, and it will leave the audience gasping.”

Well today, an early trailer/reel of the movie leaked out, and yes, it does give a brief glimpse at the dirty dark room secret. The film doesn’t come out until September 5, so watch the first look after the jump.

[News In Film]

Pencil-necked cradle-robber/once genius filmmaker Woody Allen is tight over this American Apparel ad from 2007, and is suing the brightly-colored hipster shopping haven for over $10 million dollars. According to the Dow Jones, Allen claims the billboards featuring him dressed as a rabbi (taken from a scene in Annie Hall) were used without his permission. Allen's legal team also said that the billboards not only were displayed in prime spots in NYC and L.A but also on AA's website and partner sites. We're thinking American Apparel should've just went with Matisyahu'we hear he comes much cheaper. Remember the non-Hasidic Woody after the jump with one of our favorite scenes from Annie Hall.