Sports Thanks, But No Thanks: The Six Worst Sports Traditions

It’s Thanksgiving Day, which means it’s time for somebody to carve up the Detroit Lions.

Thanksgiving is a holiday stuffed full of wonderful traditions'getting sloppy drunk at 10 A.M., inducing a coma with mass quantities of turkey and snapping wishbones in the hopes that we’ll get to put our face in Kim Kardashian’s donkey butt this year. One tradition that has no place in this mix is the NFL forcing football fans to watch the Detroit Lions get their tails whipped in a nationally televised game. Excluding 1939-1944, the Lions have been hosting T-Day games since 1934, but that doesn’t mean they should continue to even when they suck (the same goes for the currently decent Dallas Cowboys, who’ve been hosting since 1966 with the exception of 1975 and 1977).

The NFL added a third game in 2006 to counterbalance the wretchedness of its traditional games, but why not just use Thanksgiving to showcase teams that are actually good? Detroit hasn’t been in the playoffs since 1999, their current team is 0-11 and they’re playing the mighty 10-1 Tennessee Titans tomorrow (the 7-4 Cowboys face the miserable 2-9 Seattle Seahawks in another game that will put viewers to sleep faster than tryptophan). Traditionalists hate the idea of ever dumping the Lions or the Cowboys, but those assholes also think slavery and child abuse should have been preserved. So, this Thanksgiving, instead of trying to make our Kim K ass fantasies happen, we’re wishing for good football (to watch from the comfort of her donkey butt). Read on for five more horrible sports traditions that Complex wants to put an end to…