Ever since women have denied men pussy (a.k.a. “the beginning of time”), we’ve on occasion been forced to find other ways to bust off; for the majority of us, a hand and some lotion is enough (and for our rural friends, the random farm animal). But what to do when you’re sick of jacking off, far from a farm and you really need a nut? Well, you’ve got to get creative, that’s what.
Over the weekend we read the news that a 29-year-old Michigan man was arrested for “receiving dome sexual favors from a vacuum” at a car wash. A car wash vacuum, huh? Very inventive! We’ll just have to add that to our growing list of inanimate objects that desperate men have sex with.
Click here to see our list of man’s favorite inanimate sex objects…
This morning, porn star and vintner Savanna Samson debuted her HOT NEW SINGLE on Howard Stern’s Sirius show. It was totally awesome exactly what you’d imagine: semi-competent singing over a generic dance track.
But that’s not really the point, is it? Porn stars ternt sangas are by no means new; music is usually the second item on an adult performer’s bucket list, just after “appear on Howard Stern” and just before “guest star on Two and A Half Men.” That being said, are you really surprised that we went out and scoured the internets for some of these incredible vocal stylings? Didn’t think so. Check out our round-up of musical porn stars.
Click Here To Give Your Ears A Full-Body Freakin’…
With HBO’s long-awaited vampire drama True Blood starting up this Sunday, we got to thinking: even though we don’t think Anna Paquin is a vampire in the show’s first episode, chances are good she’ll be sucking on something before too long.
Which, if you ask us, is a good thing. There’s just something about a set of fangs and an insatiable appetite for man’s most vital fluid that ratchets up the sexy.
If you don’t believe us, peep some of our favorite female vampire moments…
Food options around L.A. have always been scarce, especially for adult performers. All those “no shirt, no service” and “no DPs by the salad bar” regulations can really cramp an intimate evening out. Finally, a couple of skin-flick vets have opened a “porn-friendly restaurant” called Oxygen in the middle of the Vagina San Fernando Valley.
Veronica Rayne and her partner promise a varied menu, as well as a number of booths dedicated to their close friends in the industry. Come with us for a sneak peek at the who the booths are named after, as well as some menu suggestions from their ever-helpful friends at Complex.
To browse the menu we curated click here…
It’s a sad week for '90s porn: O.G. Vivid girl Janine Lindemulder has pleaded guilty to failure to pay taxes, and faces up to $100,000 fine and a year in the bing.
Our new slogan is obvious. But Janine wouldn’t be the first adult actress to find herself behind bars'take a walk down mammary lane with us, won’t you?
Click here to see which porn stars have been locked up…
The NYC rumor mill is saying that we might be seeing an American Idol star pose for Playboy sometime in the near future. We always look forward to seeing sluts get naked and pretend like its an assertion of their feminism (whatup Kim!), and it’s not like we watch American Idol or anything, but we’re hoping it’s Katharine McPhee or Ryan Starr.
The idea of devoting 90 seconds of our lives on the internet to watch these two make out and have sex posing naked reminds us of the great sex scandals and sluts that American Idol has given us over the years, so we’ve compiled the best below.
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It’s hard to believe it was over twenty years ago that Janet Jackson threw on black jeans and a t-shirt for her classic “Pleasure Principle” video. Yesterday, the pop-starlet announced that she has teamed up with Bruno Schiavi (the man behind Dr. 90210’s intimate apparel) to create a lingerie collection named after her 1986 smash.
The announcement means that the titty-slipping queen will be joining the slew of other fly celebrity chicks who have tried to capitalize on their sex appeal by dropping “intimates.”
Click here to see our other favorite celebrity lingerie lines…
There’s a lot more to Woody Allen’s new movie Vicky Cristina Barcelona than Penelope Cruz and Scarlett Johansson’s over-hyped lip-lock. Penelope steals the show as Javier Bardem’s completely bonkers ex, who who has a tendency to show her love by stabbing and shooting.
No one can really prepare for the emotional rollercoaster that comes with leaving your lady. But if you’ve seen cautionary tales like Fatal Attraction with Glen Close'the O.G. of crazy-ass G.F.’s'then you might be more prepared when they go balls to the wall. Check out these other psycho exes and watch your back…
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We don’t normally look towards young R&B singers for advice on how to live our lives (look what happened to Raz B), but when it comes to dealing with the fairer sex, Lloyd definitely knows his shit.
His recently released album Lessons In Love was originally titled Sex Education, so we decided to put the New Orleans native to the test with some tough questions submitted by our readers. Check out young Lloyd's guidance on topics ranging from how to pick up a chick at the club, to what to do when you've gone soft…
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Tomorrow marks the publication of John Holmes: A Life Measured in Inches, the first full-length (ayo!) biography of the late great porn titan. It also marks what would have been the big guy’s (ayo!) 64th birthday, so now is as good a time as any to look back at some of the ladies who shared the screen with him. Before Jenna, before Tera, before Kim K.’s exploits, these were the golden era skin queens…
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