Let us not forget the storied history of the Segway, though! These things are awesome, from Cops running down gunmen to Arrested Development’s Gob showing how an executive can make the lamest device in the world classy. Hit the jump for a brief history the Segway…

2002: THE FIRST SEGWAY GOES INTO PRODUCTION

• There’s your dude, Dean Kamen. He’s a New Hampshire tinkerer, who figured out a way to jam a bunch of gyroscopes into your scooter for a little less than $6,000. After its 2001 unveiling, the device is hyped beyond any reasonable sales goals and is going to “change the world we live in”. The city of San Francisco, unfortunately, says “absolutely not,” and bans the device from SF sidewalks. Other cities follow suit, giving the device a rocky start.

2003: ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT DEBUTS ON TELEVISION

• What does this have to do with the Segway? Gob’s transportation of choice, of course. The Segway doesn’t get much play until season two, but this show had a lot to do with reminding people that the machines existed, and that they could be awesomely bad. If you’ve never seen this, Netflix all three seasons now.

2006: WEIRD AL YANKOVIC – “YEAH THESE SUCK”

• When this guy disses you, there’s nothing left. Or is there? You ridin’ nerdy? Segway at 1:14.

2007: FAMOUS PEOPLE SHOW UP IN VIRAL VIDEOS ON THEM (50 CENT)

• Floyd Mayweather on 50 Cent: “Real recognize real. He’s a real motherf***er, I’m a real motherf***er.”
“He’s got a Seggy, I’ve got a…wait, what the…get this dude out of here! Fuckin’ rappers.”

2007: FAMOUS PEOPLE SHOW UP IN VIRAL VIDEOS ON THEM (ALEXANDER OVECHKIN)

• Riding a Segeway, and no one knows who you are. Double fail at :28. Sorry Alex, you got to get on the PR tip.

2007: LIMITED EDITION FERRARI AND CHANEL (2009) SEGWAYS HIT MARKETPLACE

• Here’s how to fix a failing brand: make it luxury! Now it’s twice as much, but fancy.

2008: ANYONE CAN DO IT- MONKEY ON A SEGWAY

• And he looks just like me!

2008: OH WAIT. NOT ANYONE: SEGWAY FACEPLANT

• Wait for it. Waaaaait for ittttt…

2008: ESPECIALLY NOT YOUR KID

• Something about that sound that really makes you…want to watch this one twice.

2008: BUT YOU NEVER KNOW. IT MIGHT GET YOU LAID/FAMOUS PEOPLE ON SEGWAYS

• Well, probably not, actually.

APRIL 2009: SEGWAY AND GM PRESENT THE P.U.M.A

• There it is folks, and if you want to see more, get yourself over to the Javits Center in NYC this weekend.

Seven years later, less than 40,000 have been sold and people are still getting from point A to point B the same damn way. So it’s kinda surprising that the worlds largest automaker, Toyota, would even think of building a Segway competitor. But they did, and it’s called the Winglet…

Officially called a “personal transport assistance robot,” the Winglet is supposed to “contribute to society by helping people enjoy a safe and fully mobile life,” ’cause walking is so damn hard, right? It’s powered by an electric motor and keeps it balance with a bunch of internal sensors. To move the Winglet, all the rider has to do is shift their body weight in the direction they want to go in. Unlike the Segway, the Winglet is gonna come in three sizes (small, medium and large) so you can choose whichever one feels more comfortable. The Winglet is expected to be in development until next year. We admit, they look a little hotter than the Segway, but we’ll stick with the MTA. Watch a video of the Winglet in motion below.

[Toyota: News Releases]