Randy “The Big Unit” Johnson won’t be whipping balls at people’s chins anymore.
After 22 seasons, 6′ 10″, 46-year-old ace pitcher Randy Johnson just retired from professional baseball. We’ll miss his electric, lanky left arm (pause), but we’ll miss his moniker, The Big Unit, even more. As nicknames go, few stick out (or go “thwack!” on your forehead) more. In honor of one of the best dick jokes in the history of the MLB, Complex presents a very long list of other pause-worthy nicknames given to baseball players. Have a ball. Or two.
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Philadelphia Phillies, 2008 World Series Champs.
After 162 games (with a plus 1 last night), the MLB playoffs are finally here. Regular season records and accolades go out the window today when the Rockies, Phillies, Twins, Yankees, Cardinals, and Dodgers begin postseason play (the Red Sox and Angels kick off their series tomorrow night).
Other sport sites are gonna base their predictions on things like “injuries” and “statistics” and other so-called meaningful metrics. To which we at Complex say (like an ump to Bobby Cox): “F*#% outta here.” Instead, we’ve worked our predictions around the important things in baseball, the essentials like players’ wifeys and ‘roid usage. Read on for our in-depth forecast of this year’s playoff action (check back in a couple weeks for our League Championship Series and World Series breakdowns)…
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We thought we couldn’t be any more obsessed with Kim Kardashian. We were wrong. [Moe Jackson]
Word is Max B got sentenced to 75 years today. Damn, son. [Nah Right]
Feel that temperature shift? Time to get your jacket game in order. [Daily Drop]
Mariah and Nick can’t conceive so they’re adopting. Somewhere Eminem is writing punchlines. [PopCrunch]
Check out the five worst end-of-season collapses in MLB history. [Coed Mag]
If you don’t take anyone home tonight you can always check these chicks out. [Double Viking]
Why are people still surprised that celebrities do drugs? [Flisted]
It’s not too early to figure out what’s going down this Labor Day. [Holy Taco]
The beautiful Scarlett Johansson is in top form as the new face of Mango clothing. [Moe Jackson]
Oh, wow. Malice of the Clipse is actually keeping this vlogging thing going. [Nah Right]
Even those “baseball is boring” types will find these sexy MLB cheerleaders exciting. [Coed Mag]
Our girl Miss Info gets Maino to open up. [Miss Info]
We don’t really know who you are Keeley Hazell, but we definitely want to find out. [Flisted]
The new season of Entourage ends October 4. Lebron James and Matt Damon will be in the finale. [PopCrunch]
Nothing like a hot MILF to help the day go by faster. [Holy Taco]
So Nike is combining the Air Max 90 and Huarache models for a new hybrid. Awesome. [Daily Drop]
Surely, you have time to waste. Use your minutes (or hours) wisely by checking out these hotties. [Double Viking]
We don’t know what these Ashley Tisdale pics are for, but we really don’t care. Have a look for yourself. [Bastardly]
This footage of C-Murder shooting up the club, is crazy. [Rap Radar]
Check out the top 10 college prospects for the 2009 MLB draft. [CoedMag]
A gang of hotties! [Doubleviking]
Going to jail? Read this prison survival guide. [Holy Taco]
Shocker: Drake was influenced by Kanye. [Nah Right]
Apparently some schools are banning hugs. Prudes. [Lossip]
Wow. Get familiar (no Clinton Sparks) with Regiane Brunnquel. [FListed]
Only Major League Baseball could drag Opening Day out over the course of a full week. Today the season kinda, sorta kicks off on American soil at 1 p.m. and you can watch all 14 games live on MLB.com. Technically the season started a few days ago with exhibition games in Japan. And then there was last night’s home opener for the Nationals. Washington notched their first W at their new park, beating the Braves 3-2, in a game absolutely no one watched due to some basketball tournament. If your bracket is completely effed, and it is, you can still enter a little basketball tourney we have running. We’ll check back in with MLB when the Pennant race starts to come into vague focus around mid-July.
