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5 Celebrity Sex Toys You Don’t Need

American people, you have spoken with your ballots, and look what it’s gotten you: a dildo modeled after president-elect Obama. What a proud moment for us all! it’s not the first time a politician–or any public figure, for that matter–has gotten their likeness jacked (no pun intended) for a sex toy.

Hell, 50 Cent used to talk about releasing a dildo of his own, but this is a whole other situation; someone’s getting the shaft here, that’s for sure. Click on for 5 shameful instances of (mostly unauthorized) celeb-themed adult novelties…

Who’s The Most Annoying Sports Couple?

Star athletes are supposed to bang hot chicks, but that doesn’t mean we want to hear from or about their actress/singer/model girlfriends before, during, and after sporting events. Tonight, when the Dallas Cowboys play the Philadelphia Eagles on Monday Night Football, you can bank on at least five shots of Dallas QB Tony Romo’s boo Jessica Simpson cheering him on, accompanied by awkward analysis of how she may or may not jinx him or distract him from football.

Thanks in advance to the producers and analysts who allow the broadcast to be sidetracked by this bullshit. While you try to focus on the actual game action, check out ten of of the most discussed athlete-starlet couples and vote on which is the most annoying.

The Best Girl On Girl Lip-Locking Of 2008

Aubrey O’Day Photo:Just Jared

Seeing Danity Kane’s Aubrey O’Day locking lips with another female was the moment we’ve been waiting for. The surprise came last night when Aubrella was out and about with socialite/model Lydia Hearst-Shaw at the posh New York nightclub, Butter.

After landmark hook-ups like Denise Richards and Neve Campbell in Wild Things or the 2003 Madonna x Britney Spears x Christina Aguilera collabo, we thought that the trend of famous women locking lips had run its course. But even before the Aubrey/Lydia incident, it was already shaping up to be the year of the faux-lesbian make-out session. Check out our top 5 girl-on-girl moments from 2008 below.

Guy Ritchie’s Post-Madonna Prospects

His upcoming movie RocknRolla might be getting positive buzz, but Guy Ritchie’s still got some problems. The tabloids have been going nuts over the alleged “heart affair” that went on between MLB superstar Alex Rodriguez and Ritchie’s wife Madonna. Even A-Rod’s wife Cynthia has been getting some press.

Regardless of what happened, it seems like Guy has become the forgotten solider in this saga. Until now. Complex would like to announce that we’re riding with Team Ritchie. In case he ends up getting a divorce, we’ve compiled a list of other cougar ’80s pop stars who might be able fill Madge’s shoes. See our choices after the jump.

Would You Still Give Madonna The Business?

The original pop-songstress/freak-a-leak Madonna recently released her new video “4 Minutes” featuring Timbaland and Justin Timberlake, and the 49-year-old mommy doesn’t look too shabby. We’re especially feeling the skin-toned ensemble she’s rocking that highlights her non-saggy assets. Could Madge still get it? We’re leaving it up to you guys. Watch the video and vote after the jump.

Winding Down: Holy Halle Berry

Monday’s wouldn’t suck so much if we could wake up next to Halle Berry. [Holy Taco]

Forget Pap and Joey Crack, what goth-rocker do you think would body the other, Marilyn Manson or Trent Reznor?
[DoubleViking]

Ugh. Madonna was much hotter when Dennis Rodman was bedding her. Check her new album cover. [Weakgame]

Some things remain a constant on Spring Break trips, mainly girls getting retarded drunk and some a-hole with a point and shoot taking advantage. [CoedMagazine]

The Irish frat-boys are going to go nuts over this beer-pong table. St. Patty’s day all year long! [TheBachelorGuy]

Think you’re tough? Lets see if you have the stones to take part in the five manliest sports on the planet. [Justaguything]