It’s been twenty years since Baywatch debuted and eight since the classic series ended its bouncy run, and if you’ve been fiending for vapid storylines and gloriously artificial glorious twos (and who doesn’t?!), it looks like your fix may be in. Paramount Pictures recently announced that it’s hired Jeremy Garelick (an uncredited scribe on this summer’s smash The Hangover) to write and direct a Baywatch movie with a tentative release date of 2012.
There’s no way Complex is waiting three years for the film (film!), so we’ve taken the liberty of providing a few updated casting choices, complete with references to the original actresses. So please, kick back with some SPF 40 and a Piña Colada and enjoy our picks for the Girls of the New Baywatch Movie. Just don’t bring your Vaseline to the beach, homies. You know, sand and such…
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Whether she’s playing a stripper, or getting classy, Jessica Biel manages the two worlds nicely. [Bastardly]
The abstinence rock song is amazingly terrible. [Holy Taco]
Who doesn’t love jello wrestling babes? [CoedMagazine]
Pharrell and Fam-Lay get their work up. [Nah Right]
Consider this the NotCot of pretty girls. [DoubleVikingHotties]
Our sneaker homies spend five minutes with Terry Kennedy. Pause. [Nice Kicks]
Monica Cruz looks hotter than ever. [Lossip]
Eminem and Jimmy Kimmel are holding a concert for the unemployed. [PopCrunch]
Neighborhood Knockout: Kristen Bode [Flisted]
Jessica Biel acts like a stripper and we act like we’re not fully erect at work.
We’ve all seen Britney Spears’s up-skirts. Cameron Diaz’s modeling nudes, too. Now, at long last, we get to see another one of Justin Timberlake’s chicks bare-ass. That’s right, this weekend we finally get to watch Jessica Biel dancing topless in her new movie Powder Blue. She plays a single mom who strips to pay for her injured son’s hospital bills, and hers is one of four interwoven stories about coping with loss seeing Jessica Biel naked.
We can’t think of a better way for her to expose herself than playing a stripper (trust us, we thought long and hard on it). Biel is continuing a great tradition of actresses hitting the pole for roles—and we don’t mean on the casting couch. In honor of her glorious reveal, Complex remembers the best starlet stripteases in movie history. Enjoy, and maybe wait a while before you stand up and walk around the office…
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Keep holding your breath, America: Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are not engaged! JT addressed the rumors that we were completely unaware of on Oprah Friday–but that didn’t stop JB from, uh, going diamond shopping (we can pass along secondhand news as well as anyone, thun!). Presumptuous or not, it raises the inevitable question: is Biel a wifey or a trifey? Check out reasoning below, then vote for yourself…
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Happy Day Before Indigenous Genocide Thanksgiving, everybody! Since you’ll all be sitting down to a moderately annoying meal tomorrow, we thought we’d take some time out to give thanks for the upside of the wholesale destruction of the continent’s OG inhabitants. No, not the smallpox blankets or broken promises'we’re talking about the wide-ranging intermarriages and resulting hot women of all races who claim Native American blood. So let’s bury the hatchet, everyone'we’re all one tribe, right?
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The fact that anyone can start a blog doesn’t mean that everyone should. Some people just aren’t built for the demanding schedule, much-less writing a lick on WordPress. But when we see famous females squeezing out a few posts every couple of days, we can’t help adding their RSS.
Yesterday, Jessica Biel wrote a lengthy blog for her first entry, introducing herself to the blogosphere via MySpace. Sure, it was mostly shameless self-promotion of her upcoming projects, but at least it sounds like she’s actually writing it and not having her assistant handle the posts like some other A-listers. But JT’s wifey isn’t the only web-savvy woman out there. After the jump, we compiled some of the 'net’s best part-time she-bloggers and rated their skills.
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