So, to honor the Fourth of July, we’ve put together a list of honey dips from all 50 states who not only please the eyes, but also exemplify what it means to be a beautiful woman from the best country in the world. For those of you with short attention spans, you best pop an Adderall ’cause this list is a biggie. As for the rest of you, sit back with a cold sixer from Wisconsin, a bag of something sweet from California, and behold: the hottest women in the United States of America (in alphabetical order, of course)…

ALABAMA: Courtney Cox (Birmingham, AL)
ALL-AMERICAN CRED: We’ve still got nothing but love for the girl that gave us an excuse to watch Friends. After all, Americans did invent the TV sitcom.

ALASKA: Sarah Palin (Wasilla, AK)
ALL-AMERICAN CRED: What’s more American than running for vice-president? If all else fails at least she can fall back on royalty checks.

CLICK NEXT TO SEE THE SEXIEST WOMEN FROM ARIZONA AND ARKANSAS!

Even aside from that whole “slavery” debacle, our country’s earliest leaders were no angels. A closer look at the lives of politicians like Benjamin Franklin, George Washington and Alexander Hamilton reveals that they all had a few unsavory incidents in their past. After the jump, read about five dirty secrets that the founding fathers wish we would forget.

Benjamin Franklin
Writer/Inventor/Declaration of Independence Co-Author
SECRET: He Paid His Baby Mama To Keep Quiet
Perhaps the man who’s face is now on the $100 bill was making it rain the night he met the woman who would bear his first child, William. While the identity of his baby’s mom is a carefully kept secret that has eluded historians, the gossip of the time claimed that she was a prostitute who the Franklin family secretly kept around as a maid. This might be a stretch, but friends of the statesman have revealed that she was an embarrassingly poor woman who Ben paid a “small provision” to in return for her silence.

Josiah Bartlett
Congressman/Governor/Declaration of Independence Signee
SECRET: He Was All About Incest
This New Hampshire physician, supreme court judge and well-known politician married his first cousin Mary, who was the daughter of his father’s brother. The couple then proceeded to pump out a whopping 12 inbred children. The President from TV’s The West Wing, also named Josiah Bartlett, was supposed to be a descendant of this great founding father/cousin fucker. Which explains a lot.

George Washington
First President Of The United States
SECRET: He Was A Golddigger
The first President of the United States wasn’t always the most powerful man in the country. Before he met his wife Martha, he was a simple farmer and soldier who was secretely in love with his homie’s wife, Sally Fairfax. But his luck changed when friends introduced him to Martha Dandridge, a crazy rich widow. Three weeks later, they were married, and George instantly became rich as fuck. In addition to control over her 18,000 acre estate, he was soon whipping 100 slaves and doubling the size of his own own family’s house. Cha-ching!

Alexander Hamilton
First Secretary Of Treasury/Constitution Signee
SECRET: He Got Blackmailed By His Mistress’s Husband
While the Clinton name has become synonymous with political sex scandals, Alexander Hamilton was actually one of the first to admit to it. He was carrying on an affair with 23 year old Maria Reynolds, when her husband found out and proceeded to extort upwards of $1000 out of Hamilton in exchange for his silence. But when the husband got knocked on counterfitting charges, he quickly exposed the affair to Hamilton’s foe, Aaron Burr, who put his business in the streets. Years later, the grudge remained'after being challanged to a duel, Burr finally shot and killed Hamilton.

Thomas Jefferson
Third President/Author Of The Declaration Of Independence
SECRET: He Knocked Up His Slaves
Despite writing words like “the amalgamation of whites with blacks produces a degradation to which no lover of his country, no lover of excellence in the human character, can innocently consent,” Jefferson definitely loved to fuck his slaves. DNA tests have since proven that he had six children with his favorite light-skinned slave, Sally Hemings, who lived with Jefferson in France for two years. They’ll always have Paris!